Well it’s been another fruit filled week of campaigning for our dear Republican candidates. While I ruminate over their collective fodder I feel the need to expurgate with the following suggestions.
Why don’t we establish three separate oligarchies? There the candidates can rule supreme and pander to their respective minions.
One – Santoria: This could be a magical serfdom where there are no colleges or universities. All women would live like they did in centuries past in a patriarchal society. There would be no need for a higher education as all we would need would be the pearls of wisdom that proceeded from the holy lips of our faithful evangelical pope the inimitable Richard John Santorum. Such joyful facts as: “Satan has his sights on the United States of America”. The people could arm themselves accordingly. Rick Santorum would be the figurehead of this despotic society, he would be the puppet of an energy executive. True control would belong of course to his benefactor, the infallible William J. Dore. He would call the shots from his Louisiana stronghold. They could declare war on the environment and destroy everything waiting in vain for God to give them a new earth!
Two – Romnia: A wonderful country where King Willard of Mitt presides forever! It would be everyone’s task to make sure that all the trees were the correct height. Only cars that he liked would be allowed. His beloved wife, Queen Ann of Davies would have a fleet of Cadillacs. It is quite an irony that someone he despises saved General Motors the auto company that makes the very car his queen drives! All his subjects would also be required to flip flop at the drop of a hat and say anything to get noticed. His robotic style would be revered. Wall street greed would be the credo. Royal subjects would everyday strap their dogs to the roofs of their cars and speed up and down the interstate so they can get fresh air, to hell with walking them! They can defecate on the fly! PETA would be changed to: Pundits for the Egotistical Treatment of Aristocrats!
Three – Gingrinch: A fantastical world were the moon would be populated! We could shift the entire planet! There would be no need for anyone to think any more as the entire population would be controlled by a giant head encased in a bath of saline and micro-nutrients. The giant head would supply everyone’s desires. Hypocrisy would be the new religion and stupidity the role of every man, woman and child. Defy the giant head at your own peril! Periodically stem cells could be generated from his head so that his numerous wives could be impregnated. If they are not pretty enough they shall be terminated. Child labor would be reinstated. The children would slave to run the giant casinos that would operate under the auspices of the real ruler Sheldon Adelson. They would serve drinks and scrape the puke off the bathroom walls while the adults put all their savings into the slot machines!
Now where would we put these oligarchical kingdoms? If we melt Antarctica and divide it into two fiefdoms that takes care of Romnia and Santoria. Gingrinch could be a giant casino town on the moon. Now of course this is not written in stone. Dear reader if you have a suggestion it is welcome!
“History is a Nightmare from which I am trying to awaken!” – James Joyce
I have noticed lately the Occupy Wall Street movement has been getting little or no media coverage. This is a shame because I think this movement might become very powerful. To help the cause I will list some suggestions for an ultimatum.
Demand Number One: A national health care plan for every citizen of the United States. It’s been done in Canada successfully according to my cousins who actually live there. The issue in the United States is insurance lobbyists putting profits before health care. This practice should be antiquated.
Two: Government funded education for everyone. We need an educated society if we are to compete in this age of technology and communication. The system of paying for education with real estate tax is outmoded and needs an overhaul. Everyone deserves the opportunity to learn.
Three: Strict controls on wall street. Junk mortgage derivatives and their disastrous consequences were the reason for the movement to begin with. We can’t let shady bankers and brokers control the destiny of the country let alone the world. Elliot Spitzer was on the right track his libido just made a wrong turn. It’s an enormous injustice that the very legislative bodies that should be enacting legislation for tighter controls on wall street regularly profit from blatant insider trading!
Four: Regulations that protect our environment. If you think climate change isn’t real please visit the Northwest Territories and talk to some native Americans. Before we strip mine Canada for oil sands let’s shift our energy needs to renewable resources. We have bowed to the oil companies at our own peril. Look at the debacle in the middle east. Imagine all the good that might have been done if instead of spending billions on the war in Iraq we had concentrated that money on the betterment of life for all Americans!
Humans are social creatures by nature. Some socialism is a good thing. What does it profit anyone to pillage the planet and leave little for the next generation? This is not the direction of any sane theology or philosophy I know. Whether you believe in a higher power is beside the point. Think rationally of the big picture then you’ll get it.
Quite frankly I’d like to give my children’s children an existence where people sojourn in the stars together as opposed to their subsisting on Soylent Green.
“If I have seen more it is because I have stood on the shoulders of giants”. —Sir Isaac Newton
This current election is promising to be one of the most colorful we have seen in quite some time. There is a dearth of capable candidates on the side of the republicans. We have a rich capitalist that is quick to latch on to any position that he believes will help him win in Mitt Romney. In Newt Gingrich we find a man who was fined for corruption, has a revolving charge account with Tiffany’s and is on his third wife. Lastly we have Rick Santorum who is attempting to relate to the working class and feed their animosity towards anyone who lives or thinks differently than they themselves do.
What we are sorely lacking in any of these candidates is a spirit of diplomacy. This is a frightening prospect in the world we currently live in. As tensions escalate in the middle east we need cool heads to prevail. Now more than ever we need a president with an intimate knowledge of world affairs and relations or at least a willingness to learn them. As it is we have become a country at odds with itself with a spirit of deadlock in our own congress. It appears that both these trials have the common threads of money and power.
The imminent danger is the prospect of letting multinational corporations rule the world. The same entities that are capable of the most good are the ones that are capable of the greates evil. If we let power and money motivate our actions it will lead to a cycle of imminent class warfare and destruction. The United States should no longer police the world. We need to inspire our allies by showing them how a democracy can work together for the good of the common man. This can start with reigning in the power that these multinational corporations wield. To allow them unlimited air time in the realm of political sway is eerily reminiscent of George Orwell’s 1984.
“When injustice becomes law, resistance becomes duty.” – Thomas Jefferson
More next week, tune in!
Also—Put down that cell phone and DRIVE!—Jake Shween