District of Crazy; Why the Two Parties Deserve Each Other!

Another week, another scandal, what else is new while the sequester festers? Waiter I’d like to order a burnt mash of stale Benghazi with a salad of tossed Internal Revenue Service and a little Associated Press sauce on the side, hold the justice please. Press please make sure you run with these scandals and beat them into the dirt whilst other, larger shenanigans continue unchecked. Who cares if good programs to help people in need are cut if we can stir up the muck? Meals on wheels, no way! We want arguing and investigation, we are lawyers dammit not cooks! What do you think this is a breadline?

International news? Banking scandals continuing? Elections looming in Iran? Who cares! We’ve got meat head Democrats against dick weed Republicans in a cage match here! So very sorry if you registered to be a stand off snob Independent and choose not to participate in blatant bipartisan stupidity. You can’t be helped in the District of Crazy! We need reasons to do nothing and then have a Congressional investigation as to why nothing was done! Let’s spend the taxpayers money dammit! Make them forget all about the plan we have to obscure the real pertinent issues that actually affect everyone’s quality of life while we slowly pilfer every nook and cranny until there is nothing left for the sad, so called, commoner!

Go to it you fools! Please don’t let any rational thought stop you from your chosen path of hostility and obfuscation. This kind of news feed makes the Fox news team orgasmic! It is their finest hour! The culmination of their meticulous research, their fastidious fact finding and magnificent truth telling. Truly we should be thankful that there indeed are a wonderful few left who proudly make it their task to provide us with reasons to survive in this declining civilization where the coming zombie apocalypse is imminent and threatening us every day! The smart money is on the party that can tell the biggest whopper.

Let no banker be convicted! Let the hedge funds rape and pillage! We need profitability above all! Sustainability? Yes we will sustain our supply of stupidity until the planet is on the very brink. Green? Watch us put the Keystone Pipeline through while you fools are caught in a rapture of scandal. You are green and naive already so what are you possibly worried about? You idealists and environmentalists should give up now. Accountability? Dream on you dimwits! The District of Crazy has assumed control!

“Facing it, always facing it, that’s the way to get through. Face it.” — Joseph Conrad

“The belief in a supernatural source of evil is not necessary; men alone are quite capable of every wickedness.” — Jospeh Conrad

Get off the cell phone and Drive! — Jake Shween

 

Oh Romneyo, Romneyo, Wherefore Art Thou Romneyo?

It looks like this week that the Romney Campaign is in dire need of ambulatory care. This constant state of denial of reality and facts leave no other choice for himself, his deeply troubled laissez faire running mate, one Paul Ryan, and his demented staff assisting him in his pitiable run for the Presidency. Perhaps with some professional consultation we can get to the root of his constant need to avoid reality including his aversion to forty seven percent of the population of the United States. Consider his quote from Sixty Minutes on Health Care: “Well, we do provide care for people who don’t have insurance, people — we — if someone has a heart attack, they don’t sit in their apartment and — and die. We — we pick them up in an ambulance, and take them to the hospital, and give them care. And different states have different ways of providing for that care.”

Wow he needs assistance from a qualified health professional consultant. Any emergency room Doctor and their staff know that this is not the solution to the health care crisis. Preventive medicine is cheaper by far. The ambulance bill alone will be in the thousands of dollars. What about the poor woman who is single and raising a child with no health care who ends up in the emergency room at three am for help. This is Romney’s health care solution?

Does he have any idea what reality is for most of the human race? The answer is a resounding no. He reminds us of this again and again. What has become of the Republican Party as of late? It seems to have become a puppet arm of the fossil fuel consortium. The delusion continues. Evolution has been called into question. This is most interesting because where do the fossil fuel enthusiasts think all the damn FOSSIL fuel came from to begin with?

Now think of truly helping the middle class. Health care and education freely available to everyone. Clean air to breath and clean lakes and streams. Give tax breaks to clean energy companies and stop subsidizing the fossil fuel consortium. Face the fact that the easy oil to drill is gone, the easy coal to mine is gone (it should be noted here that coal burning is what causes acid rain and mercury contamination of lakes and streams), fracking for natural gas is an impractical, dangerous process and any use of these fossil fuels in the production of energy causes vast amounts of carbon dioxide to enter the atmosphere and contributes to the crisis of global warming! The Republican Party has to stop lying to the people that increased use and exploration for these dirty fuel sources will solve anything except putting more money in the pockets of the fossil fuel consortium.

“Trickle down economics is the most ridiculous economic plan. The only thing running downhill is excrement!” — Jake Shween

“Mitt Romney has more opinions than the five headed Monkey God!”—Martin Bashir

“The shoe that fits one person pinches another; there is no recipe for living that suits all cases.” — Dr. Carl Jung

Get off the cell phone and drive! — Jake Shween

Green Shween

The news is good. The caveat is that action is required immediately. It is certainly a very exciting time to be alive. All the resources of the United States must be directed to the green revolution. We have no time for naysayers. To deny global warming is quite simply ignorant. It is just as ridiculous to deny evolution. But rather than argue about superficial notions we need to get going on a green initiative and set an example for the rest of the world.

It is truly time for the people who are pro life to prove it. Prove it by preserving the earth for the future generations of life. Put your money where your mouths are. Admit that burning coal and oil is not the solution. Renewable sources of energy are the only solution. Massive green projects are needed nationwide. All our resources should be directed towards green initiatives. Buildings need to be retrofit to be energy efficient. Stop mining coal or drilling oil and start reeducating people for careers to retool the country. We can’t afford to listen to the lobbyists any longer. Throw the lobbyists out of the capital. We need lawmakers to do what they’re supposed to do and serve the public!

The new age of communication should be bringing us closer and making us smarter, not tearing us apart and dumbing us down. Stop wasting time and massive amounts of money on hollow rhetoric for the delusional power mongers. People are sick and tired of being lied to. The military industrial complex must shed its skin and transform into a project of renewal, preservation and transformation. We need to tax carbon dioxide emissions. It should not be profitable to further pollute the atmosphere. Make it profitable to be green. Save the earth. Aren’t the fires and the drought enough to convince you that something needs to change?

“Beware the Corporate Democrats their bite is as bad as the Bandersnatch! Their nose grows long, their snout is huge, they fill you with their subterfuge. Better to shun a Republican at least you know where they’re coming from.” — Jake Shween

“Batten down the hatches and if they’re battened down already, batten ’em down again!” — Bugs Bunny

Get off the cell phone and Drive! — Jake Shween