Washington Oil (Burning Man 4)

Margaret brushed the hair from her eyes in front of a large vanity mirror. Silently she rehearsed her speech. She was a bit fidgety in spite of the fact that she had been the spokesperson for the oil and gas consortium for over six years now. This was the first time however, that the entire Washington D.C. crowd would be present. Senators and congressmen, industry leaders including several Arab princes even several representatives from the Russian oil conglomerate Lukoil. She was in the midst of the oil boys. The old oil boys club.

It’s okay she thought to herself as she applied a fresh coat of lip gloss. She was remarkably attractive and she knew it. She had relied on her looks before to smooth things out with the naysayers. Just tell them what they want to hear and everyone will applaud. It was all about the money anyway. Make it sound environmentally safe and emphasize the profit. Worked every time and if there was any doubt simply grease a few palms. When had the Environmental Protection Agency ever stepped in any way? It was the same old routine. The agency might balk, some phone calls would be made, then business as usual. Ah the beauty of capitalism in the good old U.S.A.

She straightened her drink on the antique foyer table. The wood was reddish and quite old. Probably mahogany she remarked to herself, this place spares no expense. She looked in the mirror again and marveled at the seascape hanging on the wall behind her in the wide hallway. It captured her gaze for a moment and took her imagination away. The picture showed a wide beach on the one side that stretched as far as the eye could see, the other side was the ocean, with a dappling of clouds on the distant horizon.

She took a large swallow of the bourbon. Quite unladylike but it was just her in the hallway. Turning she walked up to the painting. It was a Jasper Cropsey. Probably worth a beamer at least. Back to the mirror, it was almost presentation time. She was waiting to hear her cue with a final glance at her baby blues. Wait a second! What was that? She had caught a flash in the corner of her eye. There it was again. She looked closely into the mirror which perfectly reflected the painting behind her. Right there on the distant beach something sparkled like a diamond. Was it the bourbon? Yet she knew it was something more. She turned and looked directly at the picture again. Suddenly it seemed dim and bleak.

Billy stood on the beach. It was early in the morning. He felt like he had been walking forever. He stopped for a moment and faced the ocean. He felt for the gem resting on his chest and held it up to the sunlight. It glistened brightly. He saw clouds in the distance. Clouds and blue. Blue eyes? No it couldn’t be. Just sky and forever. He held the gem and wanted to ask it a question. How much further would he have to travel alone?

https://i2.wp.com/www.saleoilpaintings.com/paintings-image/jasper-francis-cropsey/jasper-francis-cropsey-seascape.jpg

“Those who make peaceful revolution impossible will make violent revolution inevitable” — John Fitzgerald Kennedy

Get off the cell phone and Drive! — Jake Shween

GOP Sensitivity Training in the District of Capitalism

It has been announced that the Grand Old Party will be requiring its’ members to undergo ‘sensitivity training’ to aid the party in attracting more women and minority voters. This might be a great success if undergone properly and with the correct supervision. Forget Frank Luntz and the idea of a Weekend at Bernie’s . This entire procedure will require the most rigorous treatment processes not unlike the brainwashing given to the lead character Alex in the famous Stanley Kubrick film, A Clockwork Orange. (Based on the book of the same name by Anthony Burgess.)

Short of being born again here are some suggestions for GOP members:

1. Work in a fast food restaurant. Yes you read that right. Each member shall be required to complete at least 400 hours at a fast food restaurant of the independently appointed therapist’s choosing. They will not receive any special treatment as they must remain incognito for their entire term of employment. During this time their regular pay will go to charity and they will be forced to live on the minimum wage even if it means they will lose their posh DC digs. They will not be allowed to use any outside money during this time to supplement their income. They must undergo the process and humiliation of applying for food stamps and government assistance like a regular American citizen.

2. Pick vegetables with migrant workers. Each member will be assigned to live with a migrant workers family during the growing season. As above they will remain incognito. If language is a barrier they will be required to learn a foreign language. The foreman of each farm will work closely with the independently appointed therapist to make sure that each member makes their quota regardless of age, race or creed. They will not be allowed to join any union or receive any benefits during this part of their sensitivity training since they will be considered to be in the country illegally.

3. They will spend two months living with pensioners who were robbed of their pensions. Perhaps Detroit will be a good city to relocate some of the members to for this next phase of their reprogramming (since nothing short of reprogramming will bring about an epiphany). They will contribute nothing at this point but their advice on how to live on very little. In the event that there are not enough pensioners willing to take in these Beltway Bullies, they will be assigned to live with social security recipients across the country whether they be retired or on permanent disability.

4. Environmental concerns are the next phase of the sensitivity training. Each member will spend at minimum two months assisting in a cleanup of an environmental disaster. Oil spills will be a good place to train the members and give them hands on conditioning, exposure to the toxic sludge as well as a little bit of concern for the environment which they seem more than willing to destroy for the sake of corporate profits and unabated greed. If an oil spill is unavailable which seems highly unlikely they will be assigned to clean up a train wreck. Perhaps then they might see that the expense of automated braking systems for all trains is more than worth the cost of freight and human life.

5. After they complete the above training a crucial phase in the sensitivity process begins. Each member must sit in and assist a rape counselor for a minimum two month time period. They must endure the pain and tears of the victims and begin to empathize with what it feels like to have ones’ dignity and self worth violated in a single act of senseless violence. At this point the rape counselor will keep the sensitivity therapist apprised of the progress or lack thereof of each member. Since this is an especially crucial part of their training, each member will be given a performance evaluation upon completion of this phase. If they are successful they may now return to Capitol Hill.

All records of their training will be made public and posted on the internet. These are our Public Servants and as such there will be complete and utter transparency in all phases of their reintroduction to political life.

********

“One looks back with appreciation to the brilliant teachers, but with gratitude to those who touched our human feelings. The curriculum is so much necessary raw material, but warmth is the vital element for the growing plant and for the soul of the child.” — Dr. Carl G. Jung

“Instead of being presented with stereotypes by age, sex, color, class, or religion, children must have the opportunity to learn that within each range, some people are loathsome and some are delightful.” — Margaret Mead

Get off the cell phone and Drive! — Jake Shween

One looks back with appreciation to the brilliant teachers, but with gratitude to those who touched our human feelings. The curriculum is so much necessary raw material, but warmth is the vital element for the growing plant and for the soul of the child.
Read more at http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/c/carljung108028.html#xWI8eXu2dKb63RTs.99

One looks back with appreciation to the brilliant teachers, but with gratitude to those who touched our human feelings. The curriculum is so much necessary raw material, but warmth is the vital element for the growing plant and for the soul of the child.

Carl Jung

Read more at http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/c/carljung108028.html#xWI8eXu2dKb63RT

GOP Sensitivity Training in the District of Capitalism

It has been announced that the Grand Old Party will be requiring its’ members to undergo ‘sensitivity training’ to aid the party in attracting more women and minority voters. This might be a great success if undergone properly and with the correct supervision. Forget Frank Luntz and the idea of a Weekend at Bernie’s . This entire procedure will require the most rigorous treatment processes not unlike the brainwashing given to the lead character Alex in the famous Stanley Kubrick film, A Clockwork Orange. (Based on the book of the same name by Anthony Burgess.)

Short of being born again here are some suggestions for GOP members:

1. Work in a fast food restaurant. Yes you read that right. Each member shall be required to complete at least 400 hours at a fast food restaurant of the independently appointed therapist’s choosing. They will not receive any special treatment as they must remain incognito for their entire term of employment. During this time their regular pay will go to charity and they will be forced to live on the minimum wage even if it means they will lose their posh DC digs. They will not be allowed to use any outside money during this time to supplement their income. They must undergo the process and humiliation of applying for food stamps and government assistance like a regular American citizen.

2. Pick vegetables with migrant workers. Each member will be assigned to live with a migrant workers family during the growing season. As above they will remain incognito. If language is a barrier they will be required to learn a foreign language. The foreman of each farm will work closely with the independently appointed therapist to make sure that each member makes their quota regardless of age, race or creed. They will not be allowed to join any union or receive any benefits during this part of their sensitivity training since they will be considered to be in the country illegally.

3. They will spend two months living with pensioners who were robbed of their pensions. Perhaps Detroit will be a good city to relocate some of the members to for this next phase of their reprogramming (since nothing short of reprogramming will bring about an epiphany). They will contribute nothing at this point but their advice on how to live on very little. In the event that there are not enough pensioners willing to take in these Beltway Bullies, they will be assigned to live with social security recipients across the country whether they be retired or on permanent disability.

4. Environmental concerns are the next phase of the sensitivity training. Each member will spend at minimum two months assisting in a cleanup of an environmental disaster. Oil spills will be a good place to train the members and give them hands on conditioning, exposure to the toxic sludge as well as a little bit of concern for the environment which they seem more than willing to destroy for the sake of corporate profits and unabated greed. If an oil spill is unavailable which seems highly unlikely they will be assigned to clean up a train wreck. Perhaps then they might see that the expense of automated braking systems for all trains is more than worth the cost of freight and human life.

5. After they complete the above training a crucial phase in the sensitivity process begins. Each member must sit in and assist a rape counselor for a minimum two month time period. They must endure the pain and tears of the victims and begin to empathize with what it feels like to have ones’ dignity and self worth violated in a single act of senseless violence. At this point the rape counselor will keep the sensitivity therapist apprised of the progress or lack thereof of each member. Since this is an especially crucial part of their training, each member will be given a performance evaluation upon completion of this phase. If they are successful they may now return to Capitol Hill.

All records of their training will be made public and posted on the internet. These are our Public Servants and as such there will be complete and utter transparency in all phases of their reintroduction to political life.

********

“One looks back with appreciation to the brilliant teachers, but with gratitude to those who touched our human feelings. The curriculum is so much necessary raw material, but warmth is the vital element for the growing plant and for the soul of the child.” — Dr. Carl G. Jung

“Instead of being presented with stereotypes by age, sex, color, class, or religion, children must have the opportunity to learn that within each range, some people are loathsome and some are delightful.” — Margaret Mead

Get off the cell phone and Drive! — Jake Shween

One looks back with appreciation to the brilliant teachers, but with gratitude to those who touched our human feelings. The curriculum is so much necessary raw material, but warmth is the vital element for the growing plant and for the soul of the child.
Read more at http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/c/carljung108028.html#xWI8eXu2dKb63RTs.99

One looks back with appreciation to the brilliant teachers, but with gratitude to those who touched our human feelings. The curriculum is so much necessary raw material, but warmth is the vital element for the growing plant and for the soul of the child.

Carl Jung

Read more at http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/c/carljung108028.html#xWI8eXu2dKb63RT

Washington Oil (Burning Man 4)

Margaret brushed the hair from her eyes in front of a large vanity mirror. Silently she rehearsed her speech. She was a bit fidgety in spite of the fact that she had been the spokesperson for the oil and gas consortium for over six years now. This was the first time however, that the entire Washington D.C. crowd would be present. Senators and congressmen, industry leaders including several Arab princes even several representatives from the Russian oil conglomerate Lukoil. She was in the midst of the oil boys. The old oil boys club.

It’s okay she thought to herself as she applied a fresh coat of lip gloss. She was remarkably attractive and she knew it. She had relied on her looks before to smooth things out with the naysayers. Just tell them what they want to hear and everyone will applaud. It was all about the money anyway. Make it sound environmentally safe and emphasize the profit. Worked every time and if there was any doubt simply grease a few palms. When had the Environmental Protection Agency ever stepped in any way? It was the same old routine. The agency might balk, some phone calls would be made, then business as usual. Ah the beauty of capitalism in the good old U.S.A.

She straightened her drink on the antique foyer table. The wood was reddish and quite old. Probably mahogany she remarked to herself, this place spares no expense. She looked in the mirror again and marveled at the seascape hanging on the wall behind her in the wide hallway. It captured her gaze for a moment and took her imagination away. The picture showed a wide beach on the one side that stretched as far as the eye could see, the other side was the ocean, with a dappling of clouds on the distant horizon.

She took a large swallow of the bourbon. Quite unladylike but it was just her in the hallway. Turning she walked up to the painting. It was a Jasper Cropsey. Probably worth a beamer at least. Back to the mirror, it was almost presentation time. She was waiting to hear her cue with a final glance at her baby blues. Wait a second! What was that? She had caught a flash in the corner of her eye. There it was again. She looked closely into the mirror which perfectly reflected the painting behind her. Right there on the distant beach something sparkled like a diamond. Was it the bourbon? Yet she knew it was something more. She turned and looked directly at the picture again. Suddenly it seemed dim and bleak.

Billy stood on the beach. It was early in the morning. He felt like he had been walking forever. He stopped for a moment and faced the ocean. He felt for the gem resting on his chest and held it up to the sunlight. It glistened brightly. He saw clouds in the distance. Clouds and blue. Blue eyes? No it couldn’t be. Just sky and forever. He held the gem and wanted to ask it a question. How much further would he have to travel alone?

https://i2.wp.com/www.saleoilpaintings.com/paintings-image/jasper-francis-cropsey/jasper-francis-cropsey-seascape.jpg

“Those who make peaceful revolution impossible will make violent revolution inevitable” — John Fitzgerald Kennedy

Get off the cell phone and Drive! — Jake Shween

SCOTUS Trips Then Flips; Paula Deen Comes Afro Clean; What the Frack?!

Oyez oyez oyez the Supreme Court of the United States predominantly made up of angry old men lawyers has jilted many citizens this past few days with some interesting and volatile decisions sure to confuse some of the resident zombies in this fair land. Firstly a decision was made to eliminate the Voting Rights Act! Just think, prejudice has been vanquished! Gerrymandering and redistricting are no longer an issue we need to pay any attention to! Let the hatemongers do as they may it’s just a matter of time until their sons and daughters are marrying outside the Klan! It’s out of our hands, this is our last stand!

Secondly the Defense of Marriage Act was voted to be unconstitutional. Hail Mary! This sure made quite a few Christian zombies upset. How interesting this decision is juxtaposed against the aforementioned vote! Maybe now people can actually begin to be comfortable about their sexuality and there will be no societal stigma attached to their own personal way of life. Certainly the confused and conflicted will continue to be just that,  however,  this is a landmark decision in the right direction for the advancement of human kind!

Paula Deen comes afro clean! Ah the pitiful revelation of a butter slinging television “chef” that she used a hateful term for another race thirty years ago and now repents. Perhaps the media has judged her too harshly. No, it is quite evident that she has judged and convicted herself. She has caused her own demise and toppled herself from her gastric throne of high calorie dishes. Her public relations firm, Butter, Cupcakes and Tears has failed bitterly in it’s attempt to buoy her reputation as well as retain her sponsors. She should have hired Anthony Bourdain as her lawyer and her public relations person and she might have been better off. But there is a sliver lining! Her cookbooks are now flying out of the Amazon warehouse! Apparently butter can still lubricate the tightest of situations!

Speaking of lubrication, oil man who? It appears that we keep getting oil men in the White House! We went from George W. Bush who was a very obvious oil man and friend of the Saud to Barack Obama who seems to lean with the oil companies whether the majority likes it or not! In his speech Tuesday he avoided saying outright that he opposes the Keystone XL pipeline. Instead saying that he would not approve it if it is shown to affect climate change! Say what?! Sounds like the old “we need more studies” bull excrement that we’ve been hearing for years. Yes Mr. President fossil fuel will affect climate change in a deleterious way. Period. End of story!

All that hot air brings us to this gas. If you think fracking is safe think again. The oil companies are doing everything in their power to convince us that this is a safe fuel source and what a bedazzling public relations extravaganza they have constructed. We now have a “fracosauras” by the name of “Talisman Terry” extolling the “clean” and widely available energy source of natural gas. It would be better to have Ronald McDonald trying to convince cows that eating beef was in their best interest! If we can sell it to the kids the adults will follow suit right?! What the frack!?

“I is what I is” — Paula Deen

Get off the cell phone and Drive! — Jake Shween

District of Crazy; Why the Two Parties Deserve Each Other!

Another week, another scandal, what else is new while the sequester festers? Waiter I’d like to order a burnt mash of stale Benghazi with a salad of tossed Internal Revenue Service and a little Associated Press sauce on the side, hold the justice please. Press please make sure you run with these scandals and beat them into the dirt whilst other, larger shenanigans continue unchecked. Who cares if good programs to help people in need are cut if we can stir up the muck? Meals on wheels, no way! We want arguing and investigation, we are lawyers dammit not cooks! What do you think this is a breadline?

International news? Banking scandals continuing? Elections looming in Iran? Who cares! We’ve got meat head Democrats against dick weed Republicans in a cage match here! So very sorry if you registered to be a stand off snob Independent and choose not to participate in blatant bipartisan stupidity. You can’t be helped in the District of Crazy! We need reasons to do nothing and then have a Congressional investigation as to why nothing was done! Let’s spend the taxpayers money dammit! Make them forget all about the plan we have to obscure the real pertinent issues that actually affect everyone’s quality of life while we slowly pilfer every nook and cranny until there is nothing left for the sad, so called, commoner!

Go to it you fools! Please don’t let any rational thought stop you from your chosen path of hostility and obfuscation. This kind of news feed makes the Fox news team orgasmic! It is their finest hour! The culmination of their meticulous research, their fastidious fact finding and magnificent truth telling. Truly we should be thankful that there indeed are a wonderful few left who proudly make it their task to provide us with reasons to survive in this declining civilization where the coming zombie apocalypse is imminent and threatening us every day! The smart money is on the party that can tell the biggest whopper.

Let no banker be convicted! Let the hedge funds rape and pillage! We need profitability above all! Sustainability? Yes we will sustain our supply of stupidity until the planet is on the very brink. Green? Watch us put the Keystone Pipeline through while you fools are caught in a rapture of scandal. You are green and naive already so what are you possibly worried about? You idealists and environmentalists should give up now. Accountability? Dream on you dimwits! The District of Crazy has assumed control!

“Facing it, always facing it, that’s the way to get through. Face it.” — Joseph Conrad

“The belief in a supernatural source of evil is not necessary; men alone are quite capable of every wickedness.” — Jospeh Conrad

Get off the cell phone and Drive! — Jake Shween

 

Forget Reality this is Much More Important

Pull up a chair and set a spell there is a whole other round of reality coming your way this week in the news. Pay no attention to the media circus behind the curtain. It doesn’t matter that the Pope is resigning and he actually was not, common to contrary belief, fired by Donald Trump. There is also no truth to the rumor that the Catholic Church is beset by scandal and backstabbing infighting. Remember these men of God have forsworn their egos to serve the true Christ. Far be it for them to be guilty of the pompous sin of envy  and the filthy sin of lust. It seems as if they had not found a career serving God they could have just as easily pursued the noble professions of banking or lawyering.

Scandal is as scandal does and the merry go round continues in the fabulous world of beltway bloviating. Nothing new to report dear readers. Very little has changed politically. However, the climate is still rapidly changing. Oil companies are hastily trying to sell us on fracking and how extremely safe and bankable it is. (For them it is – they are certain to rape a tidy profit!) Also the calls for the Keystone Pipeline, a huge pipeline through the middle of the country to transport “shale oil” is causing a ruckus. Remember now you cannot have your cake and eat it too! We can’t burn up the world and grow trees at the same time. Make up your mind dammit.

Sequester this and sequester that, kick the can and let the fat lady sing. Let’s cut all the helpful programs because we still didn’t pay for that damn Iraq war we were sold by the warmongering cronies we were stuck with in the beginning of the millennium. Imagine a reality where those cronies accepted that responsibility and were actually accountable for their actions!? Who owns a huge chunk of that debt? China! Now we owe China some serious coin.  Meanwhile China is trying to hack our computers. Gee ya think they remember the Opium Wars and maybe they are still sore about that? C’mon fellas we were doing our best to be the most honorable pirates as sanctioned by God and the king! Hell don’t dare raise the minimum wage! We need division and an abyss. Let us have our walls and lawyers to hide behind. D.C. runs on lawyers, bad blood and empty rhetoric.

H.S.B.C. the Hong Kong and Shanghai Banking Corporation has gotten away with murder. Not the first bank and in no way the last. Nothing new here however just another story about money getting in the way of humanity in the sense that humans are supposedly compassionate creatures. But wait are we really compassionate? Is that a reality or just something the Pope wanted us to believe? Some sugar coated Christian cake. An idealist version of a juvenile reality. No wonder the Pope quit. Was that a wolf with a suitcase full of money running down the road? Profit, not The Prophet, is God. Christ is for suckers.

https://i2.wp.com/behance.vo.llnwd.net/profiles12/878305/projects/2946991/578f8145339fbed96972260b275305e7.jpg

“That weapon will replace your tongue. You will learn to speak through it. And your poetry will now be written with blood.” — Nobody, from Dead Man by Jim Jarmusch

“Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored.” — Aldous Huxley

Get off the cell phone and Drive! — Jake Shween