Tag Archives: gun control

Tea Party Nationalism and The Fourth Reich

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Welcome to the new tea party. Come on in and join the fracas. “Don’t tread on me” is our new slogan. Here we share our love of hatred. Never mind that we consider ourselves religious. Maybe we just like to burn our crosses to show their importance in our lives. Immigration reform you say? Never, not on our watch! We don’t want any new people here competing for our jobs. No surprise what party we have aligned ourselves with. The right, the right the ever illuminated right, the GOP the grand old party spread the hate and laugh real haughty. We don’t just make history we invent it! Science and education are for the birds, all we need is ammunition and propaganda to extoll the virtues of our isolationism.

Never you mind that none, that’s right none of us came from the Americas. It’s our land now and we don’t need no one else. Those damned Indians were just red devils anyway. Check your Bible it’s in the book of Cruz chapter 4 verse 20. We’re closing the doors on that god dammed diversity. It’s scary! We don’t like strangers taking our land unless its the oil company come to frack us all to our Honey Boo Boo heaven. We just like people who align themselves with our own close mindedness. There is no global warming that’s a damn hoax. Scientists with nothing better to do than make up bullshit to scare people is all that is. Burn coal and natural gas! Smells almost like gun powder and what could be better?

Speaking of hoaxes how’d we end up with a Black President? That makes us madder than a bob cat caught in a piss fire. Screw raising the minimum wage we like people to be pissed off and poor, if we have to hate now they do too! Pollution control, no way, we need the oil companies dumping filthy water on the Indian reservations in Wyoming. Serves those red devils right we never wanted them anyway. We like climate change it gives us more crap to bitch about! The north pole is melted? Let the Eskimos paddle their way out of that one, better not show up at my door. Chinese probably did it anyway. Abortions!, we hate abortions, we are all god’s creatures after all, not to mention we need the target practice when those little bastards grow up and come into our neighborhoods.

Don’t you have any sense of Nationalist pride? Look what that little vegan bastard did in the Reich land. He almost ruled the world! Maybe this time we can do that here. We don’t need no melting pot of diverse cultures. We like everything the same as long as we can bitch and hate on something. No need for too much reading or writing just show me someone who can shoot a gun and I will show you the way to peace. It’s not with logic or reason or your stupid idealism. It’s with stand your ground and if you’re not from around here go back to wherever you came from.

“I think… if it is true that there are as many minds as there are heads, then there are as many kinds of love as there are hearts.” ―  Leo Tolstoy from Anna Karenina

“If man is to survive, he will have learned to take a delight in the essential differences between men and between cultures. He will learn that differences in ideas and attitudes are a delight, part of life’s exciting variety, not something to fear.” — Gene Roddenberry

Get off the cell phone and Drive! — Jake Shween

Save the Dinosaur in the Senate

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Recently a very serious situation has developed in the Senate and one of our dearest and most ancient demagogues has become seriously endangered. Senator Addison Mitchell (Mitch) McConnell Jr. is now facing a heated battle being opposed by Alison Lundergan Grimes the crackerjack, feisty Secretary of State of Kentucky. Fortunately Mitch has a crack team of garbage digging cohorts who are scrambling to insure his survival, albeit for the time being, by slinging dirt and generally being the most unwelcoming of opponents possible.

To cap off our dear dinosaur’s dilemma he’s facing opposition from a member of his own party in the primaries, the U.S. Chamber of Commerce hating champion of the illustrious Glenn Beck himself, Matthew Griswold Bevin. This man is a certifiable Teanderthal with credentials coming from the rightest and tightest but not so brightest Bluegrass Institute for Public Policy Solutions. He’s already infamous for being against the bank bailout of 2008 that helped save his business thus earning him the affectionate moniker of: Bailout Bevin!

You may recall that Mitch had suffered an apparent ‘Nixonian bugging’ of his office. This happens when you receive a small Nixon doll in the mail, place it on your bookshelf, and the next thing you know Mother Jones is hawking stories about how very evil you actually are with an honest recording of your thugs plotting against anyone who dared to thwart your despotic behavior. Yes Mitch was ‘tricky Dicked’! Now the Federal Bureau of Investigation has taken over. Taxpayer money at work doing the important things like protecting our venal elected despots and preserving their right to preserve their particular special interest group unfettered by ethical behavior and such trifles.
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Maybe fellow libertarian/republican junior Senator from Kentucky Rand Paul and ‘Ole Mitch’ can hole up together! They can collect guns, swig whiskey, swap wives and trade stories about shootin’ those yonder revenooers! The Nixon doll will have to go of course. They might be happier with an Ayn Rand doll and maybe a Raggedie Ronnie Reagan. Pull the string on Ayn and she says: “The question isn’t  who is going to let me it’s who is going to stop me!”. Ronnie exhorts when you drop him on his head: “Facts are stupid things!”. Why they can amuse themselves in lockstep together as they contemplate how to hold democracy hostage for their own selfish desires. That is of course after they do something important like blocking any common sense bill on gun control or the possibility of raising the minimum wage etc. etc. etc!

It will be interesting to see where the ‘Dark Money’ takes the ensuing campaign. One thing is for certain and that is the people of Kentucky need to be aware of the facts. They need to show they won’t be boondoggled by a media blitz of lies, lies, lies which is sure to be paid for by a Super PAC of nebulous money which ultimately originates from the Koch brothers and their minions.

Watch Bill Moyers and Company expose ‘Dark Money’ here!

Get off the cell phone and Drive! — Jake Shween

Flight 101 (Burning Man 9)

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Eddie Sargavy stood in the terminal at the Montreal Trudeau international airport staring at the departure screen. He sipped his coffee and shook his head. He hadn’t missed his flight this time. His flight had been cancelled. He looked at his watch then wondered why since the time seemed to be posted everywhere like an inescapable fate. It was 1:01 pm. Ironically that was his flight number. There was a bad storm moving up the easy coast and all the flights to JFK had been cancelled.

He walked outside the terminal and lit a cigarette. Just as well he thought to himself. Something in his mind remembered that flight 101 was not a flight to be on. He remembered other flight 101’s crashing somewhere. He finished his coffee and spit into his cup. “101st Airborne” he said aloud. The woman standing next to him heard and moved away. He thought about history. The 101st, the Screaming Eagles, that was the “Band of Brothers”. Among their many heroic exploits one was being an integral piece of Operation Overlord in World War II. In Vietnam they were famous for outstanding bravery in the battle of Hamburger Hill. He choked up a bit and wiped his eyes. Eddie was not a man who stood still. He went back into the terminal. He would rent a car and drive to New York.

Eddie flew down the highway in his full size, brand new Dodge Charger. He had passed through customs quickly as he had nothing to declare. Heck he’d been through the border so many times he felt like he should know all the customs agents on a first name basis. It felt good to be on the move again. Never mind that he was tired, he was on his way home.

He thought about his presentation that morning. He had ended up winging the whole thing. The more he had talked the better he felt. Eddie was a pro. It didn’t matter that his heart wasn’t in it. He was glad it was over with and the client, Truefoam, seemed satisfied. He had the radio blasting loudly. The satellite radio was perfect for these extended drives. No station flipping necessary. The October scenery in the Adirondack mountains was beautiful. He only wished it was summertime and the daylight would last longer. A glance at the gas gauge and the rumbling of his stomach told him it was time to refuel and grab a bite. Just outside of Albany he took an exit that offered gas and a bag of cheeseburgers within spitting distance of each other.

Eddie turned down his radio as he pulled off the ramp. He had been blasting a song by Tito Puente. He loved the Latin salsa and was thankful the satellite radio had a station dedicated to that sound. It was dark out now but the air was still friendly. He pulled up to the pump, ready for a stretch. Yawning as he locked the doors he went inside to relieve himself. It felt good to be out of the car if only for a minute.

Returning to the car with six cheeseburgers and a large coffee he noticed a car of teenagers had pulled up a short distance away. The music blasted out of the vehicle. He could hear the vibrations as he stooped inside the Charger to put the burgers and the coffee inside. What was the recent story in Florida? Oh yes, he thought, some lunatic had sprayed bullets into a car when he thought the music was too loud. It reminded him of a time years ago when he was with his precious wife Gloria, a beautiful girl from Cuba. They were taking a road trip in his Pontiac Bonneville which had come with a brand new 8 track player. They had pulled into a full service station outside of Baton Rouge. Birdland blasted from their car. He leaned over and kissed Gloria. Just then a rather nondescript man walked by. “Turn that Spic shit down!” he said loudly. Eddie complied, he felt sheepish. He was nineteen years old and had been married for a month. He wondered where that burst of hatred had come from.

He finished pumping his gas and pulled away. The music from the teenagers’ car still resonated in his ears. He liked a different kind of music but he’d be damned if he’d ever shoot somebody over such a ridiculous thing. “The world is a fucked up place” he said aloud. He hit the gas so hard his tires screeched. The advantages of a rental he thought. He thought about Gloria who had died of cancer years earlier. He knew she could never be replaced so he had never given it a second thought. He was married to his job ever since.

As he hit the entrance ramp to 87 south, Tito came on the radio. It was “Jam En El Bario”. Eddie hit the gas hard and wondered aloud, “aren’t we all our brother’s keeper?”. A light rain had begun to fall.

Get off the cell phone and Drive! — Jake Shween

A World Full of Bullies; Captalism and Religion

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It’s pretty obvious that we have created a nation of bullies. Perhaps we could stretch that and go so far as to say a world full of bullies. Is this the apex of evolution? The true survival of the fittest? In one incident after another humans have seen the collapse of empathy for one’s fellow human being. This does not bode well for the capitalist system. In order for the human race to get beyond this pivotal point it may be necessary to decline to fight and not “stand one’s ground”.

As history has bore out time and again, a certain type of behavior will continuously foster similar behavior. It becomes a perpetual cycle of greed and hatred. Sadly each begets the other. Religion, if actually practiced, seeks to reduce or even eliminate these feelings. Sadly it often has the opposite effect and becomes justification for usurping others property or even their very lives in the name of one’s chosen entity. Further exacerbating the idea of religious concept is the notion of capitalism. Ownership of wealth and property enabling oneself to perceive a certain sense of entitlement.

Add to this the ready availability of deadly weapons and you create a perfect storm of violence the world over. Every day people are dying because of greed and hatred in the name of religion or capitalism. The more we hear about it, the more we fear it, the more we feel we need to be armed against it. Thus the cycle continues ad infinitum. This cannot possibly be the apex of evolution as humankind is so apt to crown themselves. This behavior will lead to nothing but eventual extinction.

When you think this out it is not difficult to see the logic behind this argument. Every day comes a new barrage of information, an onslaught of the mass media directing us to what they think we should be thinking about. We need to take a step back and consider for ourselves with our own reasoning. Be careful that you are not destroying something because you are scared of it or because you just don’t understand it. Be careful that you aren’t pushing someone around because they aren’t acting in your interest or in the interest of the corporation that is padding your pockets full of cash. The sanctity of life depends on empathy. Every major religion recognizes this. Practice it every day.

“The word ‘belief’ is a difficult thing for me. I don’t believe. I must have a reason for a certain hypothesis. Either I know a thing, and then I know it – I don’t need to believe it.” — Dr. Carl Gustav Jung

“If there is anything that we wish to change in the child, we should first examine it and see whether it is not something that could better be changed in ourselves.” — Dr. Carl Gustav Jung

Get off the cell phone and Drive! — Jake Shween

The word ‘belief’ is a difficult thing for me. I don’t believe. I must have a reason for a certain hypothesis. Either I know a thing, and then I know it – I don’t need to believe it.
Read more at http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/c/carljung157279.html#qH2R2B5QKIBOx7b5.

GW Bridge? Fuggedaboutit

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Ah the pure politics in the United States of New Jersey. Who could possibly imagine for one moment that the saintly Governor Christie would ever pull off such a dirty deed as to totally screw up the traffic in Fort Lee because he didn’t get Ft. Lee Mayor Mark Sokolich’s endorsement for Governor? Fuggedaboutit. It just didn’t happen. Governor Christie pleads the fifth. How dare you accuse such a Republican icon of playing dirty politics. He didn’t stop the garbage pick up in Newark because of Cory Booker did he? No the guys a prince.

Governor Christie would make a great President! Imagine him dealing with the other dignitaries of the world. What culture and class. He’d tell them to kiss his fat ass! He’d say: “None of your damn business Putin, Merkel, Abbot or that frikkin’ jack off Pope Francis.” Hell he’d even tell Rush Limbaugh where he can stick it. Any problems? Just make a phone call and “take care of that thing”. Fuggedaboutit. He’s with me. He’s okay. I swear on my Mother’s grave.

People ya gotta stop picking on this guy. Look at all the great shit he’s done. He frikkin’ vetoed a minimum wage increase! He said no to marriage equality. No way to equal pay for those dumb broads. Stricter gun laws? What the frikkin’ hell you crazy? What’s Gino gonna do without a piece to protect the drug money at the pizzeria? Increase taxes for the wealthy? Again, are you deaf? This man is out for justice. Jobs bills my ass. Let them earn their way up like the rest of us wise guys. We paid our dues. Christie’s a prince, you can take that to the grave. Fuggedaboutyou!

“As far back as I can remember, I always wanted to be a gangster” — Henry Hill (played by Ray Liotta) in Goodfellas

“Leave the gun, take the cannolis” — Capo in the Clemenza family (played by Richard Castellano) in The Godfather

Get off the cell phone and Drive! — Jake Shween

Guns, Nuts and Government Ruts

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Maybe in a thousand years or so Americans will finally figure out that having a lot of guns laying around is bound to increase the probability that someone will be shot. Seems rather obvious when you think about it doesn’t it? When there is a lot of jellyfish in the ocean you likely will get stung if you go in the water. If there’s poison ivy all over the place outside you might very well step in it. The more there is of it around the greater the chance of contact. Wasps flying everywhere increases the possibility of getting stung; you get the picture now don’t you? Why are there so many people in denial of such an obvious logical conclusion? It’s hard to believe that people are just that stupid!

Speaking of nuts we need to heal our relationship with Iran while the door is opening. Never mind that they aren’t all clones of us. Forget the xenophobia you learned from the haters. The majority of Iranian people like the same things that we do: Video games, fast cars, rock & roll and movies with a little bit of hooch on the side. Their new president, Hasan Rouhani seems to be willing to negotiate and talk in a level headed manner we have not seen for many years. Let’s hear him out! Soon he will be addressing the United Nations and we need to listen carefully. Have you ever seen a pistachio nut from Iran!? They are as big as your thumb! Nowhere in the world are they as large and tasty. We need to lift trade sanctions and restore these bombs of nutrition to our tables as soon as possible!

 

Which brings us to the same old bombastic bologna happening in Congress. Once again the Republican stooges are threatening to shut down the government and not pay America’s debts if the Affordable Health Care act gets any funding in the new budget. Rush Limbaugh is calling for a “complete repeal and to start from scratch”. How about instead of that we have a complete repeal of Congress and start from scratch! The American people are overdue for leaders that will represent them and not the insurance companies, multinational corporations (big oil) and Wall Street bankers. The tea baggers have quickly outworn their welcome and proven that they are nothing more than corporate shills. It’s time we put the needs of the many above those of the privileged few.

Limbaugh Bloviating (see above)

“The miracle is this: The more we share the more we have.” — Leonard Nimoy

“Man has such a predilection for systems and abstract deductions that he is ready to distort the truth intentionally, he is ready to deny the evidence of his senses only to justify his logic.” — Fyodor Dostoyevsky

Get off the cell phone and Drive! — Jake Shween

Tea Party Nationalism & The Fourth Reich

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Welcome to the new tea party. Come on in and join the fracas. “Don’t tread on me” is our new slogan. Here we share our love of hatred. Never mind that we consider ourselves religious. Maybe we just like to burn our crosses to show their importance in our lives. Immigration reform you say? Never, not on our watch! We don’t want any new people here competing for our jobs. No surprise what party we have aligned ourselves with. The right, the right the ever illuminated right, the GOP the grand old party spread the hate and laugh real haughty. We don’t just make history we invent it! Science and education are for the birds, all we need is ammunition and propaganda to extoll the virtues of our isolationism.

Never you mind that none, that’s right none of us came from the Americas. It’s our land now and we don’t need no one else. Those damned Indians were just red devils anyway. Check your Bible it’s in the book of Cruz chapter 4 verse 20. We’re closing the doors on that god dammed diversity. It’s scary! We don’t like strangers taking our land unless its the oil company come to frack us all to our Honey Boo Boo heaven. We just like people who align themselves with our own close mindedness. There is no global warming that’s a damn hoax. Scientists with nothing better to do than make up bullshit to scare people is all that is. Burn coal and natural gas! Smells almost like gun powder and what could be better?

Speaking of hoaxes how’d we end up with a Black President? That makes us madder than a bob cat caught in a piss fire. Screw raising the minimum wage we like people to be pissed off and poor, if we have to hate now they do too! Pollution control, no way, we need the oil companies dumping filthy water on the Indian reservations in Wyoming. Serves those red devils right we never wanted them anyway. We like climate change it gives us more crap to bitch about! The north pole is melted? Let the Eskimos paddle their way out of that one, better not show up at my door. Russians probably did it anyway. Abortions!, we hate abortions, we are all god’s creatures after all, not to mention we need the target practice when those little bastards grow up and come into our neighborhoods.

Don’t you have any sense of Nationalist pride? Look what that little vegan bastard did in the Reich land. He almost ruled the world! Maybe this time we can do that here. We don’t need no melting pot of diverse cultures. We like everything the same as long as we can bitch and hate on something. No need for too much reading or writing just show me someone who can shoot a gun and I will show you the way to peace. It’s not with logic or reason or your stupid idealism. It’s with stand your ground and if you’re not from around here go back to wherever you came from.

“I think… if it is true that there are as many minds as there are heads, then there are as many kinds of love as there are hearts.” ―  Leo Tolstoy from Anna Karenina

“If man is to survive, he will have learned to take a delight in the essential differences between men and between cultures. He will learn that differences in ideas and attitudes are a delight, part of life’s exciting variety, not something to fear.” — Gene Roddenberry

Get off the cell phone and Drive! — Jake Shween

The Secret D-Bag Patrol

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Ted Cruz stared uneasily out of the hotel room door as the cars screamed down the Sam Houston highway. He had chosen this location for the meeting because of its’ low profile guests and the easy access to the George Bush Intercontinental Airport. “The Hyatt Place Bush”, he said to himself. “Intercontinental Bush” he snorted. “Sounds like a Cambodian hooker.” He stepped back into the room and stared at his cell phone. He tweeted: ‘Defund Obama care now and I denounce my Canadian Identity’. He walked back into the bathroom and touched up his mascara. He smiled and winked at himself. “No one must ever know”.  He picked up a bottle of mouthwash and swallowed hard three times. He felt absolved and headed back to the door waiting.

Down in the parking lot below a Mexican cab driver was arguing with a woman about her cab fare. “Damn looney tunes” he caught himself, he had almost yelled down and told the noisy pair to shut up. At the far end of the parking lot a Hummer limo was pulling in. He walked back inside the door and wrung his hands together in a washing motion. He couldn’t stand the suspense and crept back to the door. Peeping out with a raccoon eye he saw a small figure get out of the limo surrounded by three burly body guards. He thought the passenger glanced up at him but he couldn’t be sure. Scratching his head he wondered again if it was really true. No sooner had he sat in the gaudy chair and turned on Fox news there was a knock at the door. He said “It’s unlocked” as if he was too important to get up.

The door swung open forcefully as a large man abruptly entered. Behind his frame, almost infantile in his presence was the teen phenom, the one the only, Justin Beiber. Ted sprang up as if to defend his chair, “No bodyguards” he said. The large man retreated. It was him and Justin. “Come here my Canadian boy”, Ted crooned with a syrupy sweetness that was gooey like maple syrup. “I don’t believe that it’s true!” whined Justin, “It cannot be!”.

“Now, now the DNA tests don’t lie, plus you have a smarmy way about you, you know it’s true”. “You are my illegitimate son!”

Ted flopped back in the chair. What he had said relieved him of his dark secret. While on the debate team years ago he had been unrestrained in his words. More than his tongue had been wagging! He blamed his incontinence on his hot Cuban roots.

“But I love Canada and health care and hip hop and tattoos!” Justin whined in protest.

“Face it son, Canada sucks, healthcare is socialism and gun control is downright Communist. Plus you can’t out debate me. Not yet you hip hop wanna be. Here’s the deal you help me and I help you!”

“I’ll never help you. Never. Rudy come and get meeee!” Justin pleaded as the door swung open. The large man scooped him up with leathery hands like a sheep herder plucking out a young ram to be neutered. “I don’t know why I came here.”

“Well don’t forget you will never escape the fact that secretly we are truly members of the secret d-bag patrol. You have your baggy, falling down pants and I have my crappy attitude and mascara. Plus we both love the Jesus”, Ted said loudly, “The Jesus.”

Justin turned and looked back. “You’re a Kanye West fan?”, he asked.

“No dammit not Kanye you jackass, the Jesus, we are a father and son in Christ so don’t ever forget that all our douche bagginess will be forgiven.”

The door shut quickly. It was Ted alone in the room again. He opened his suitcase and cradled his revolver. He rubbed it like there was a genie inside. He had really wanted Justin’s support and acceptance but at least he had the gun. He went back into the bathroom placing his precious gun by the sink. He daubed at his eyes. His mascara was waterproof thankfully. He picked up the mouthwash and took another swig. “Oh Canada” he hummed to himself.

“For every one of us who succeeds, it’s because there’s somebody there to show you the way out.” — Oprah Winfrey

“The cool thing about being famous is traveling. I have always wanted to travel across seas, like to Canada and stuff.” — Britney Spears

Get off the cell phone and Drive! — Jake Shween

Tea Party Nationalism & The Fourth Reich

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Welcome to the new tea party. Come on in and join the fracas. “Don’t tread on me” is our new slogan. Here we share our love of hatred. Never mind that we consider ourselves religious. Maybe we just like to burn our crosses to show their importance in our lives. Immigration reform you say? Never, not on our watch! We don’t want any new people here competing for our jobs. No surprise what party we have aligned ourselves with. The right, the right the ever illuminated right, the GOP the grand old party spread the hate and laugh real haughty. We don’t just make history we invent it! Science and education are for the birds, all we need is ammunition and propaganda to extoll the virtues of our isolationism.

Never you mind that none, that’s right none of us came from the Americas. It’s our land now and we don’t need no one else. Those damned Indians were just red devils anyway. Check your Bible it’s in the book of Cruz chapter 4 verse 20. We’re closing the doors on that god dammed diversity. It’s scary! We don’t like strangers taking our land unless its the oil company come to frack us all to our Honey Boo Boo heaven. We just like people who align themselves with our own close mindedness. There is no global warming that’s a damn hoax. Scientists with nothing better to do than make up bullshit to scare people is all that is. Burn coal and natural gas! Smells almost like gun powder and what could be better?

Speaking of hoaxes how’d we end up with a Black President? That makes us madder than a bob cat caught in a piss fire. Screw raising the minimum wage we like people to be pissed off and poor, if we have to hate now they do too! Pollution control, no way, we need the oil companies dumping filthy water on the Indian reservations in Wyoming. Serves those red devils right we never wanted them anyway. We like climate change it gives us more crap to bitch about! The north pole is melted? Let the Eskimos paddle their way out of that one, better not show up at my door. Russians probably did it anyway. Abortions!, we hate abortions, we are all god’s creatures after all, not to mention we need the target practice when those little bastards grow up and come into our neighborhoods.

Don’t you have any sense of Nationalist pride? Look what that little vegan bastard did in the Reich land. He almost ruled the world! Maybe this time we can do that here. We don’t need no melting pot of diverse cultures. We like everything the same as long as we can bitch and hate on something. No need for too much reading or writing just show me someone who can shoot a gun and I will show you the way to peace. It’s not with logic or reason or your stupid idealism. It’s with stand your ground and if you’re not from around here go back to wherever you came from.

“I think… if it is true that there are as many minds as there are heads, then there are as many kinds of love as there are hearts.” ―  Leo Tolstoy from Anna Karenina

“If man is to survive, he will have learned to take a delight in the essential differences between men and between cultures. He will learn that differences in ideas and attitudes are a delight, part of life’s exciting variety, not something to fear.” — Gene Roddenberry

Get off the cell phone and Drive! — Jake Shween

Save the Dinosaur in the Senate; Don’t Get ‘Tricky Dicked’

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Recently a very serious situation has developed in the senate and one of our dearest and most ancient demagogues has become endangered. Senator Addison Mitchell (Mitch) McConnell Jr. had been facing a possible run by one Ashley Judd an entertainer known more for her acting abilities than her political views. Fortunately Mitchy had a crack team of scum digging cohorts who were able to insure his survival, albeit for the time being, by digging up dirt on Ashley Judd whom apparently had still not made up her mind and announced any official run for the senate seat of the endangered species of lummox who has been holding up justice and progress for far too long.

Poor Mitchy had suffered an apparent ‘Nixonian bugging’ of his office. This happens when you receive a small Nixon doll in the mail, place it on your bookshelf, and the next thing you know Mother Jones is hawking stories about how very evil you actually are with an honest recording of your thugs plotting against anyone who dared to thwart your despotic behavior. Yes Mitchy was ‘tricky Dicked’! Now the Federal Bureau of Investigation has taken over. Taxpayer money at work doing the important things like protecting our venal elected despots and preserving their right to preserve their particular special interest group unfettered by ethical behavior and such trifles.
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Maybe Rand Paul and ‘Old Mitchy’ can hole up together! They can collect guns, swig whiskey, swap wives and trade stories about shootin’ those yonder revenooers! The Nixon doll will have to go of course. They might be happier with an Ayn Rand doll and maybe a Raggedie Ronnie. Pull the string on Ayn and she says: “The question isn’t  who is going to let me it’s who is going to stop me!”. Ronnie exhorts when you drop him on his head: “Facts are stupid things!”. Why they can amuse themselves in lockstep together as they contemplate how to hold democracy hostage for their own selfish desires. That is of course after they do something important like blocking any overdue debate or common sense bill on gun control!

“Violence, even well intentioned, always rebounds upon oneself.” — Lao Tzu

“If you want beautiful music, you must play the black and the white notes together.” — Richard M. Nixon

Get off the cell phone and Drive! — Jake Shween