The Grand Old Paralysis

It seems like the Republican Party is now in its’ death throes in these United States. The message of the party is confused and very twisted. What was once the cause of conservatism has become a cause of hatred. None of the proposals of this party benefit the common citizen of the country. A party like this cannot survive. A sad divided party with confused religious principles and a twisted view of science will inevitably implode as it is already showing signs of doing. Educated people will see through the folly of following such a lost cause.

Despite the stupid notions and hate filled lies of Fox News and the likes of Rush Limbaugh eventually common sense and diplomacy will win out. Violence and hatred never solved anything. Violence and hatred cannot nurture life or the earth, two things that humanity needs to survive. The greed of corporations will not win out either. The attempts of a few to direct the political conversation through bullying and large sums of money is doomed as the people hear and know the truth. The population has reached the point of political advertising saturation. The average American’s BS meters have already gone off the charts. It is not the least surprising that in the Republican’s desperate attempt to retain control they who are in power are attempting to quash and control education everywhere. Education and the scientific principle cause people to question everything!

We must be vigilant and voice our disapproval of these crude methods and show up at the polls and vote this hatred away. We must protect the earth now and cease to destroy our home. If they want to hide the chemicals used in the fracking process obviously something is very wrong. We can’t let them poison our water and then sell us water. We can’t let them poison our food by genetically modifying it to carry toxic levels of pesticide. We can’t allow them to control and patent the seeds of the food we plant. These are just some of the ways that backward political parties seek to control and divide us. The Republican mission has become one to create fear and mistrust of each other to further divide us. These ultimately profit and power oriented motives are evil and must be stopped. It is time to act, stand together unified, and be counted.

We need politicians who believe and act on principles for the greater good. We don’t need ‘Corporate Democrats’ just playing a role to fool us! Education and communication are the keys to lift humanity out of its’ current trajectory towards destruction or dystopia. The notion of money controlling everything will be stopped as this world is witness to a change for the worse all around us. We will see the harmful results of profit as the only motivating force. We must evolve to a system of beliefs where the motivating force is life. We must adopt a philosophy of kindness.

“This is my simple religion. There is no need for temples; no need for complicated philosophy. Our own brain, our own heart is the temple; the philosophy is kindness.” — Dalai Lama

“It has always seemed strange to me… the things we admire in men, kindness and generosity, openness, honesty, understanding and feeling, are the concomitants of failure in our system. And those traits we detest, sharpness, greed, acquisitiveness, meanness, egotism and self-interest, are the traits of success. And while men admire the quality of the first, they love the produce of the second.” — John Steinbeck

Get off the cell phone and Drive! — Jake Shween

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

New Conversion Therapy Makes Republicans Gayer!

In a little reported discovery earlier this week doctors in Thailand have isolated a gene which if manipulated carefully by radiation therapy may result in a generation of gayer Republicans. Doctor Poon Tang of Twatyang Institute of Bangkok announced that for several years now his team had been working on a remedy for the typical constipated, small minded, anti-art Republican. After years of intensely secretive research on this particularly frustrating ailment, using primarily voluntary test subjects from various infected red states, areas known for their contamination, Doctor Tang and his team proclaimed satisfactory seminal results from the preliminary reparative therapy.

“We have isolated the ARTGAP1 gene and provided it with ample doses of healing sunshine from the premises of our happy domicile. In this extrusion we have exhibited such effects as are known to provide a well being for the healing process. After several treatments our exceedingly successful subjects have returned to their normal lives with renewed sense of health, vigor and enlightenment. We hope soon to expose this treatment to many more constipated republicans in the hope of causing the gridlock and cultural stink to end in the middle of our great friend country America.” Doctor Tang said through an interpreter.

Rumors are already circulating in Stockholm, Sweden that Doctor Poon Tang and the prestigious Twatyang institute may very well win this years Nobel Prize in medicine. This will be the first such award for a doctor from Thailand. Doctor Poon Tang and his staff announced that they would be thrilled to receive such an award. Doctor Poon Tang also graciously invited any small minded constipated Republicans who wish to seek his treatment free flights and room and board. Lucky participants will get an all expense paid trip to the luxurious Shangri-La Hotel located on the banks of the River of Kings just blocks from the Twatyang Institute. Treatment will be administered over the course of several weeks and entertainment is all included.

In the rare and strange event that this new miraculous treatment does not work; litigate not. There are many vacancies available working with old and crippled lawyers in the dark swampy jungles of nearby Laos.

“Constantly choosing the lesser of two evils is still choosing evil.” — Jerry Garcia

“Never pretend to a love which you do not actually feel, for love is not ours to command.” — Alan Watts

Get off the cell phone and Drive! — Jake Shween

The Grand Old Paralysis

It seems like the Republican Party is now in its’ death throes in these United States. The message of the party is confused and very twisted. What was once the cause of conservatism has become a cause of hatred. None of the proposals of this party benefit the common citizen of the country. A party like this cannot survive. A sad divided party with confused religious principles and a twisted view of science will inevitably implode as it is already showing signs of doing. Educated people will see through the folly of following such a lost cause.

Despite the stupid notions and hate filled lies of Fox News and the likes of Rush Limbaugh eventually common sense and diplomacy will win out. Violence and hatred never solved anything. Violence and hatred cannot nurture life or the earth, two things that humanity needs to survive. The greed of corporations will not win out either. The attempts of a few to direct the political conversation through bullying and large sums of money is doomed as the people hear and know the truth. The population has reached the point of political advertising saturation. The average American’s BS meters have already gone off the charts. It is not the least surprising that in the Republican’s desperate attempt to retain control they who are in power are attempting to quash and control education everywhere. Education and the scientific principle cause people to question everything!

We must be vigilant and voice our disapproval of these crude methods and show up at the polls and vote this hatred away. We must protect the earth now and cease to destroy our home. If they want to hide the chemicals used in the fracking process obviously something is very wrong. We can’t let them poison our water and then sell us water. We can’t let them poison our food by genetically modifying it to carry toxic levels of pesticide. We can’t allow them to control and patent the seeds of the food we plant. These are just some of the ways that backward political parties seek to control and divide us. The Republican mission has become one to create fear and mistrust of each other to further divide us. These ultimately profit and power oriented motives are evil and must be stopped. It is time to act, stand together unified, and be counted.

We need politicians who believe and act on principles for the greater good. We don’t need ‘Corporate Democrats’ just playing a role to fool us! Education and communication are the keys to lift humanity out of its’ current trajectory towards destruction or dystopia. The notion of money controlling everything will be stopped as this world is witness to a change for the worse all around us. We will see the harmful results of profit as the only motivating force. We must evolve to a system of beliefs where the motivating force is life. We must adopt a philosophy of kindness.

“This is my simple religion. There is no need for temples; no need for complicated philosophy. Our own brain, our own heart is the temple; the philosophy is kindness.” — Dalai Lama

“It has always seemed strange to me… the things we admire in men, kindness and generosity, openness, honesty, understanding and feeling, are the concomitants of failure in our system. And those traits we detest, sharpness, greed, acquisitiveness, meanness, egotism and self-interest, are the traits of success. And while men admire the quality of the first, they love the produce of the second.” — John Steinbeck

Get off the cell phone and Drive! — Jake Shween

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Grand Old Paralysis

It seems like the Republican Party is now in its’ death throes in these United States. The message of the party is confused and very twisted. What was once the cause of conservatism has become a cause of hatred. None of the proposals of this party benefit the common citizen of the country. A party like this cannot survive. A sad divided party with confused religious principles and a twisted view of science will inevitably implode as it is already showing signs of doing. Educated people will see through the folly of following such a lost cause.

Despite the stupid notions and hate filled lies of Fox News and the likes of Rush Limbaugh eventually common sense and diplomacy will win out. Violence and hatred never solved anything. Violence and hatred cannot nurture life or the earth, two things that humanity needs to survive. The greed of corporations will not win out either. The attempts of a few to direct the political conversation through bullying and large sums of money is doomed as the people hear and know the truth. The population has reached the point of political advertising saturation. The average American’s BS meters have already gone off the charts. It is not the least surprising that in the Republican’s desperate attempt to retain control they who are in power are attempting to quash and control education everywhere. Education and the scientific principle cause people to question everything!

We must be vigilant and voice our disapproval of these crude methods and show up at the polls and vote this hatred away. We must protect the earth now and cease to destroy our home. If they want to hide the chemicals used in the fracking process obviously something is very wrong. We can’t let them poison our water and then sell us water. We can’t let them poison our food by genetically modifying it to carry toxic levels of pesticide. We can’t allow them to control and patent the seeds of the food we plant. These are just some of the ways that backward political parties seek to control and divide us. The Republican mission has become one to create fear and mistrust of each other to further divide us. These ultimately profit and power oriented motives are evil and must be stopped. It is time to act, stand together unified, and be counted.

We need politicians who believe and act on principles for the greater good. We don’t need ‘Corporate Democrats’ just playing a role to fool us! Education and communication are the keys to lift humanity out of its’ current trajectory towards destruction or dystopia. The notion of money controlling everything will be stopped as this world is witness to a change for the worse all around us. We will see the harmful results of profit as the only motivating force. We must evolve to a system of beliefs where the motivating force is life. We must adopt a philosophy of kindness.

“This is my simple religion. There is no need for temples; no need for complicated philosophy. Our own brain, our own heart is the temple; the philosophy is kindness.” — Dalai Lama

“It has always seemed strange to me… the things we admire in men, kindness and generosity, openness, honesty, understanding and feeling, are the concomitants of failure in our system. And those traits we detest, sharpness, greed, acquisitiveness, meanness, egotism and self-interest, are the traits of success. And while men admire the quality of the first, they love the produce of the second.” — John Steinbeck

Get off the cell phone and Drive! — Jake Shween

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

GW Bridge? Fuggedaboutit

Ah the pure politics in the United States of New Jersey. Who could possibly imagine for one moment that the saintly Governor Christie would ever pull off such a dirty deed as to totally screw up the traffic in Fort Lee because he didn’t get Ft. Lee Mayor Mark Sokolich’s endorsement for Governor? Fuggedaboutit. It just didn’t happen. Governor Christie pleads the fifth. How dare you accuse such a Republican icon of playing dirty politics. He didn’t stop the garbage pick up in Newark because of Cory Booker did he? No the guys a prince.

Governor Christie would make a great President! Imagine him dealing with the other dignitaries of the world. What culture and class. He’d tell them to kiss his fat ass! He’d say: “None of your damn business Putin, Merkel, Abbot or that frikkin’ jack off Pope Francis.” Hell he’d even tell Rush Limbaugh where he can stick it. Any problems? Just make a phone call and “take care of that thing”. Fuggedaboutit. He’s with me. He’s okay. I swear on my Mother’s grave.

People ya gotta stop picking on this guy. Look at all the great shit he’s done. He frikkin’ vetoed a minimum wage increase! He said no to marriage equality. No way to equal pay for those dumb broads. Stricter gun laws? What the frikkin’ hell you crazy? What’s Gino gonna do without a piece to protect the drug money at the pizzeria? Increase taxes for the wealthy? Again, are you deaf? This man is out for justice. Jobs bills my ass. Let them earn their way up like the rest of us wise guys. We paid our dues. Christie’s a prince, you can take that to the grave. Fuggedaboutyou!

“As far back as I can remember, I always wanted to be a gangster” — Henry Hill (played by Ray Liotta) in Goodfellas

“Leave the gun, take the cannolis” — Capo in the Clemenza family (played by Richard Castellano) in The Godfather

Get off the cell phone and Drive! — Jake Shween

‘Twas A Week Before Christmas & All Through The House…,

‘Twas a week before Christmas

And all through the House,

A Boehner was stirring,

The Tea Bagging crowd!

He passed a Ryan budget.

And much to their spite,

He called out the Funders

Of the far flinging Right!

Meanwhile the Limbaughs, the Hannitys and Becks

Were soaking their microphones,

With foam and spit flecks

They called him a turncoat,

And no Santa Claus

But then came Pope Francis,

To give everyone Pause,

He was the first Pope

To emulate Christ,

By shining an example

That made everyone look twice.

He called out our Idols,

The Capitalist Klan!

He asked us to Share More

With our Fellow Man!

And by an example

He sets with his Life

He shows us a way

To lessen our strife.

So heed now Pope Francis,

Whatever your faith

His words full of wisdom

Can heal us of Hate

And maybe just maybe

There’s hope in this world

When we all come together

And the truth is Unfurled!

“A propensity to hope and joy is real riches; one to fear and sorrow real poverty.” — David Hume

“Avarice, the spur of industry.” — David Hume

Get off the cell phone and Drive! — Jake Shween

Offer Solutions; We Know There’s A Problem

What can be done about so much hate and criticism all over the media these days? Its’ presence is pervasive in every form of media and certainly in the increasingly ridiculous realm of politics. People are freely sharing their hatred of one thing or another because they can do so in a fashion that appears to be anonymous. Nothing constructive comes out of any of this bullying and spewing of venom. Feel free to disagree with other people’s opinions but please note that bitterly sharing insult and vitriol is not the way solutions for a better way of doing things comes about.

We need to start respecting each others opinions and sharing our human experience and diversity. It is the politicians job to mitigate this communication and turn it into something constructive. Most need to rise above their chosen profession of law as this by its’ very nature coldly removes itself from a certain level of humanity. We need politicians who actually listen to the people the have been elected to serve as opposed to serving their own special interests and egotistical aspirations. It’s time to elevate the level of communication in the four estates of American Government; not to debase it into the name calling playground confrontation it has become.

Furthermore if we can remove the influences of big money from politics we will actually empower the individual! It’s absolutely amazing how many privately funded political interest groups use advertising and media influences to suggest quite the opposite is true. In reality, when the motivations are revealed, it’s not hard to tell the difference between the good and the bad guys. No rose colored glasses required simply a good measure of common sense. Corporations are not people nor do they behave altruistically. The Supreme Court has done our country a great injustice in upholding their rights as individual entities. Remember as well: Politicians serve the People; not the other way around!

“The more you can increase the fear of drugs and crime, welfare mothers, immigrants and aliens, the more you control all the people.” — Noam Chomsky

“Liberals are concerned about the concentration of wealth because it inevitably leads to a concentration of power that undermines democracy.” — Robert B. Reich

The more you can increase fear of drugs and crime, welfare mothers, immigrants and aliens, the more you control all the people.
Read more at http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/n/noamchomsk166977.html#cDHWZldj6QGEAGO7.99
The more you can increase fear of drugs and crime, welfare mothers, immigrants and aliens, the more you control all the people.
Read more at http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/n/noamchomsk166977.html#cDHWZldj6QGEAGO7.99
The more you can increase fear of drugs and crime, welfare mothers, immigrants and aliens, the more you control all the people.
Read more at http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/n/noamchomsk166977.html#cDHWZldj6QGEAGO7.99

Get off the cell phone and Drive! — Jake Shween

Wanted: Independent Leaders for the Republican Party

The Republican party of the United States is in dire need of a complete overhaul. Somehow they have gone seriously off course. By pandering to the far right of extremism and embracing such monolithic mouthpieces as Limbaugh, Trump and Fox News the party has become lost in a morass of discord and hatred. At least Mitt Romney had the tact to admit defeat graciously in spite of the fact that he led a devious campaign filled with distortions of reality. Now Fox News has the crazy people in their glorious team of social miscreants accusing the other side of playing dirty to win the election! Of course the blow hard Trump and Limbaugh are quick to join in this cacophony of blithering idiocy. Whoa to the Republican party if it continues to let these mental midgets define who they are!

The Republican party is in dire need of some person to step above this fray. Someone with the will and fortitude to stand up to and put to rest this creed of lobbyist Grover Norquist. A free thinker who can put the former Scranton weatherman Bill O’Reilly in his place when O’Reilly suggests that the Republican party failed because the majority of people in The United States of America have declining moral values. Stop making excuses that have no basis in reality! The American people are wising up to the Republicans distortions of reality and very bad math. Put forth a free thinker who without condescension can tell the truth to America and argue for a wiser form of government. If not the Republican party will continue to disintegrate into a party that relies on hatred, lies, distortions and name calling if they have any hope of further deceiving the general population and that is not a path to lasting success.

Unfortunately for now there seems to be no such person on the horizon for the Republicans. Any rising star they have quickly becomes part of the military industrial complex and puts on the jack boots of their party members. Even the so called mavericks of the party have been stilted. The tea party has turned into the fossil fuel party. Maybe a camping trip to Greenland in the summer time is in order to prove to the last of the nay sayers that carbon dioxide is indeed heating the atmosphere and something needs to be done quickly and completely to avert worse disaster. Republicans need to embrace science and stop pretending it is something made up to bewilder them and call their faith into question. The sooner the party realizes that it can’t bully its way out of every problem the sooner they might produce a capable and courageous candidate who will not only earn the respect of the American people they will deserve it.

“Conservatives define themselves in terms of what they oppose.” — George Will

“I have a very large Twitter.” — Donald Trump

“The only way to reduce the number of nuclear weapons is to use them.” — Rush Limbaugh

Get off the cell phone and Drive! — Jake Shween

Note: This was originally posted on November 7th 2012. It seems particularly relevant today as the Nation came precariously close to defaulting on its’ loans due to some delusional Republicans who had forgotten who won the Presidency. The message is the same.

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Guns, Nuts and Government Ruts

Maybe in a thousand years or so Americans will finally figure out that having a lot of guns laying around is bound to increase the probability that someone will be shot. Seems rather obvious when you think about it doesn’t it? When there is a lot of jellyfish in the ocean you likely will get stung if you go in the water. If there’s poison ivy all over the place outside you might very well step in it. The more there is of it around the greater the chance of contact. Wasps flying everywhere increases the possibility of getting stung; you get the picture now don’t you? Why are there so many people in denial of such an obvious logical conclusion? It’s hard to believe that people are just that stupid!

Speaking of nuts we need to heal our relationship with Iran while the door is opening. Never mind that they aren’t all clones of us. Forget the xenophobia you learned from the haters. The majority of Iranian people like the same things that we do: Video games, fast cars, rock & roll and movies with a little bit of hooch on the side. Their new president, Hasan Rouhani seems to be willing to negotiate and talk in a level headed manner we have not seen for many years. Let’s hear him out! Soon he will be addressing the United Nations and we need to listen carefully. Have you ever seen a pistachio nut from Iran!? They are as big as your thumb! Nowhere in the world are they as large and tasty. We need to lift trade sanctions and restore these bombs of nutrition to our tables as soon as possible!

 

Which brings us to the same old bombastic bologna happening in Congress. Once again the Republican stooges are threatening to shut down the government and not pay America’s debts if the Affordable Health Care act gets any funding in the new budget. Rush Limbaugh is calling for a “complete repeal and to start from scratch”. How about instead of that we have a complete repeal of Congress and start from scratch! The American people are overdue for leaders that will represent them and not the insurance companies, multinational corporations (big oil) and Wall Street bankers. The tea baggers have quickly outworn their welcome and proven that they are nothing more than corporate shills. It’s time we put the needs of the many above those of the privileged few.

Limbaugh Bloviating (see above)

“The miracle is this: The more we share the more we have.” — Leonard Nimoy

“Man has such a predilection for systems and abstract deductions that he is ready to distort the truth intentionally, he is ready to deny the evidence of his senses only to justify his logic.” — Fyodor Dostoyevsky

Get off the cell phone and Drive! — Jake Shween

Supreme Court Approves Union of O’Reilly & Limbaugh

In a surprise emergency verdict today the Supreme Court announced the decision to allow the same sex marriage of Bill O’Reilly the esteemed Scranton weather man turned Fox News political pundit and the ‘Jabba the Hut Like’ Rush Limbaugh disseminator of misinformation on the radio! Justice Anton Scalia delivered the unanimous decision of the court allowing that the two ‘incontrovertibly demonstrated’ the ability to argue and feud just like a married couple is apt to do so: ‘why not let the two deviants tie the knot and consummate the union the old fashioned way!’ Great plans for this festive occasion are already under way. Prince Remus (Reince Priebus) has agreed to be the wedding planner!

So far the rumors are that the wedding will take place in South Beach Miami at the luxurious Trump International Beach Resort. The guest list is quite extensive and is sure to grow. The highly steamed and overwhelmingly evil dictator with a bad haircut of the tiny sad country of North Korea, one Kim Jong Un is to preside over the wedding ceremony as he has already been credited by certain lunatic fringe GOP party members to be the cause of unholy matrimony as well as gun control and rampant paranoia among other afflictions of mental paucity. It is only fitting that he preside since he is the cause of such diverse mental dysentery. The best man is sure to be Kim’s best bud the highly tattoed and well punctured former member of the Chicago Bulls basketball team the rebounding and ever eloquent Dennis Rodman! Ann Coulter will be the flower girl but no word yet on whether her bulldog will attend.

Representative Louie Gohmert republican of Texas has been outspoken in his support of such odd partnerships. He actually had predicted that such match ups would surely take place after he confessed his attraction to a Gila monster last November. Prince Remus thinks he has an eye for decorating so he has placed Representative Gohmert in charge of festooning the buffoonery! A Tex Mex theme it may very well be. The illustrious Wayne LaPierre, el presidente of the NRA, will be in charge of catering the event and is sure to provide plenty of fresh red meat for all to consume in corpulent debauchery. Donald Trump has promised full access to his ‘very large Twitter’ to help spread the word!

Bend over Rush and brace yourself! Bible thumping Bill is coming in from behind! Shades of deliverance upon you all! Lord have mercy we’re having a hoe down!

“I’ve always been crazy it keeps me from going insane!” — Waylon Jennings

“When the Democrats flip their kritch like these bastards let me know!”                  — Jake Shween

Get off the cell phone and Drive! — Jake Shween