Category Archives: Uncategorized

Bullies Should Not Be Rewarded

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If you have never had the experience of being chased or taunted by a bully consider yourself fortunate. The terror of walking down the hall in high school and being grabbed from behind and thrown into the boys room for a game of mum’s the word is something you will never forget. Maybe you spoke funny, perhaps your hair was long compared to the norm or your shoes were out of date, your glasses were as thick as coke bottles, who knows? Who knows what made the bully and his gang so hostile and what gave them such a superior air? Could it be the fact that they came from the wealthy side of town and you were from the other side? No matter because suddenly there you were, alone, surrounded by troglodytes led by a fiend landing numerous punches all over you and if you made so much as a peep they punched you even harder. Thus the name of the game: Mum is the word. No you will never forget such an experience.

Imagine now this same bully running a management company. Perhaps his management consulting company does very well and makes tons of money. He leads ruthlessly with his clever band of financial pirates and vacuums up smaller companies. He promises their upper management golden parachutes while he runs the regular employees into the ground. He creates impossible debt for these companies while promising them the world. Oh well, didn’t work? Credit run out? No problem just burn it to the ground. Best of all is everything is legal. Heck he can even hide his profits through tax loopholes and numerous incentives to keep his money offshore. Create wealth? No this bully just takes it.

Several more years down the road and this certain bully is now running for the most powerful job in the world. He is using the same tactics that he has used all his life. Remember now this is the guy who used to lie to the principals face without batting an eye. The guy who could cheat, lie and beat up innocent people without suffering any consequences. His idea of diplomacy is the mobs’ idea of negotiating. Punch first and ask questions later. There is no way the United States needs a guy like this sitting in the White House! Surely he would run this country into the ground and take the environment with him. He would also take care of all his wealthy friends by continuing to give them tax cuts while the middle class and poor bleed to death. Any credibility the United States has with the rest of the world would be destroyed by his simplistic and bullying tactics. Fellow Americans: Bullies Should Not Be Rewarded!

“The trust of the innocent is the liar’s most useful tool” — Stephen King

“The place where you made your stand never mattered. Only that you were there… and still on your feet.” — Stephen King

Get off your cell phone and Drive! — Jake Shween

The Case for Truth and Reality

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The stage exploded tonight at the Democratic National Convention. The truth has been explained and put on the table. How much longer do the Republicans expect the American people to believe in their blatant lies and fantastical stories of wealth that trickles down? The Republican party has become the party of the oligarchy. Sure there are Corporate Democrats but they are outnumbered by the slash and burn Republicans on the other side of the aisle. The obstinate behavior, the unwillingness to cooperate is now squarely on the shoulders of the foolish senators and congressmen who refused to come across the aisle and do what was right for the country.

Mitch McConnell, Eric Cantor and John Boehner your lying days are over. Certainly your K Street friends will snap you up for their lobbying assignments. You need to get out of the way of progress and out of the way of providence. Your obstinance and evil are increasingly evident and exposed. People are becoming wise to the preposterous realities that Fox News dares to propose as being real. Even members of your own party are starting to cut their losses and run from the extreme right and its’ crippling hatred. The three of you have done nothing but blocked President Obama at every turn. McConnell you stood in front of a microphone and admitted such childish behavior! Cantor you stormed out of the room when Boehner even suggested a concession to the Obama administration. If you were all back in kindergarten you would be called out for antisocial behavior. It’s quite an outrage that you were elected to serve the public.

Changes are coming. The truth is now on the table for everyone to see. The channels of communication are open. The young people are listening. They need education to compete in an increasingly technical world with reliance on engineering and science. Education will help this country to compete and succeed in what will be an exciting and challenging future. Health care and education should be fundamental rights that are affordable to every American. If government is broken and not working it is the right of the people in a democracy to change it. McConnell, Cantor and Boehner like three intractable louts, you need to get out of the way.

“The keystone of successful business is cooperation. Friction retards progress.”— James Cash Penney

“If the administration wants cooperation, it will have to begin to move in our direction.”— Mitch McConnell

Get off the cell phone and Drive! — Jake Shween
Here’s a pic from Charlotte today and DNC protesters

Corporations are NOT people!

A Divided House; A Leaking Roof and A Crumbling Facade

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The Government of the United States is broken. Days into the Republican National Convention it becomes crystal clear that the two outspoken factions of our Government can no longer communicate in a civil and courteous manner. The rehearsed rhetoric thus far displayed by the Republicans, the party of the rich, shows us nothing but vitriol and blame. The Founding Fathers certainly expected heated discourse between two parties but at least it was discourse. The parties listened to each other. This civility and respect is now a thing of the past. Now the speeches call upon feelings of animosity and division.

Ironically the Capitol is currently in serious disrepair. The roof is now leaking and the facade is crumbling dangerously. The Senate and the House are not surprisingly unable to agree on the  procurement necessary to repair this damage. This should not be a partisan issue. The building should be a lasting symbol of the history of this once great and democratic country. Shame on these so called public servants who have been so bribed by the oligarchy that they cannot even agree on getting the leak in the roof fixed. How symbolic that this is happening at a time of such vitriol and division. The very building that houses our legislature and appears on the currency of the Nation is crumbling and eroding away as does our values, virtues and ability to compromise let alone communicate.

There comes a time when the very people that we elected to bring about civilization and prosperity must redirect their energy do do just that! For too many years now they have been wined, dined and swayed to be the gigolos of the lobbyists and special interests. For too long the needs of the general populous and the environment have been ignored. The conscience of the country has been mislead, diverted and perverted by outright lies! Right now we are experiencing ad after ad of outright lies! People please hear the truth don’t be swayed by the oligarchy. Big oil is concerned with nothing but profits. The plight of the common man is ignored. Young men die to defend oil fields. The so called rich don’t even want to either fight themselves or even pay for the wars they start! The cowards would rather blame the current President for the huge deficits. Not the wars and the tax cuts that George W. put into place. Their puppets and gigolo friends are in place to carry on their deception. Don’t let your vote be purchased. Defend liberty and defend the planet!

“Words will not be able to ever express how sorry I am for this, and I have profound regret and sorrow for the multitude of mistakes and harm I have caused.” — Jack Abramoff

“If I read the articles about me, and I didn’t know me, I would think I was Satan.” — Jack Abramoff

Get off the cell phone and Drive! — Jake Shween

Green Shween

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The news is good. The caveat is that action is required immediately. It is certainly a very exciting time to be alive. All the resources of the United States must be directed to the green revolution. We have no time for naysayers. To deny global warming is quite simply ignorant. It is just as ridiculous to deny evolution. But rather than argue about superficial notions we need to get going on a green initiative and set an example for the rest of the world.

It is truly time for the people who are pro life to prove it. Prove it by preserving the earth for the future generations of life. Put your money where your mouths are. Admit that burning coal and oil is not the solution. Renewable sources of energy are the only solution. Massive green projects are needed nationwide. All our resources should be directed towards green initiatives. Buildings need to be retrofit to be energy efficient. Stop mining coal or drilling oil and start reeducating people for careers to retool the country. We can’t afford to listen to the lobbyists any longer. Throw the lobbyists out of the capital. We need lawmakers to do what they’re supposed to do and serve the public!

The new age of communication should be bringing us closer and making us smarter, not tearing us apart and dumbing us down. Stop wasting time and massive amounts of money on hollow rhetoric for the delusional power mongers. People are sick and tired of being lied to. The military industrial complex must shed its skin and transform into a project of renewal, preservation and transformation. We need to tax carbon dioxide emissions. It should not be profitable to further pollute the atmosphere. Make it profitable to be green. Save the earth. Aren’t the fires and the drought enough to convince you that something needs to change?

“Beware the Corporate Democrats their bite is as bad as the Bandersnatch! Their nose grows long, their snout is huge, they fill you with their subterfuge. Better to shun a Republican at least you know where they’re coming from.” — Jake Shween

“Batten down the hatches and if they’re battened down already, batten ’em down again!” — Bugs Bunny

Get off the cell phone and Drive! — Jake Shween

 

The Lost Boys Run; The Wooden Dummy and The Rhinestone Cowboy

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The Game is officially begun and the contestants have been announced. We now have established a Republican ticket for the ages. Please be prepared for some of the lowest intellectual levels of political advertising and discourse this country has ever seen. We have the marvelous Wooden Dummy in the form of Willard Mitt Romney. Watch how he grins, grimaces waves his finger and retreats. If you thought Ronald Regan was a puppet for the right wing haters you ain’t seen nothing yet. God forbid this Republican buffoon should ever divulge his taxes. Rumor now has it that he committed a felony for which he was granted amnesty! What is really hiding in the returns he won’t divulge? Ooops! Sounds like a felony! Uh oh Hot Dog!

Enter our heroic vice presidential nominee the illustrious Rhinestone Cowboy, Paul Ryan the buccaneer budgeteer. Never mind that he once embraced the teachings of the avowed capitalist, atheist and feminist upstart Ayn Rand. Why this Rhinestone Cowboy even once claimed that her teachings were the very reason he chose politics as his career. He went so far as to require that every member of his staff read her capitalist manifesto: Atlas Shrugged. Of course this was much to the horror and chagrin of the God fearing Catholic Americans who he now embraces whole heartedly. Sadly they no longer seem to embrace him at all. Will the genuine Rhinestone Cowboy please stand up? Perhaps not, it seems he is duplicitous at best. Smoking Joe Biden is more interesting. At least he shoots from the hip and says what he’s thinking.

This should make for some delightful debates both presidential and vice presidential. God willing the debates will advance the level of rhetoric beyond uttering falsehoods and distortions of reality. Watch as each side retreats to their corners to consult the cut man before the bell rings. Notice that certain constituents on both sides have suddenly gotten very quiet. Is there a smoking gun that at the last moment will bring down the Wooden Dummy? Time will tell and meantime enjoy the show. McCain and Palin were just the warm up act for the Wooden Dummy and the Rhinestone Cowboy.

“Where hustle’s the name of the game
And nice guys get washed away like the snow and the rain
There’s been a load of compromisin’
On the road to my horizon
But I’m gonna be where the lights are shinin’ on me” — from the song: Rhinestone Cowboy written by Larry Weiss

“It’s not the way he says it, it’s what he said, but what can you say with a wooden head? Whether the time is cloudy or the time is sunny it’s always time for Jimmy the talking dummy” — from the song: Jukie’s Ball by Dan Hicks

Get off the cell phone and Drive! — Jake Shween

Death in the Produce Aisle; Genetically Modified Truths

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He stood in the produce aisle debating what to eat for dinner that night. Several vegetables caught his eye and brought up visions of culinary delights. The crookneck squash looked particularly delectable with its bright glossy yellow skin. Next to that a bin of ears of corn. The ears were large and firm. They also appeared perfectly edible. The produce person was sorting through the broccoli and arranging fresh bunches. He politely asked the store employee, “are these vegetables genetically modified?”. “I’m really not sure.” answered the broccoli sorter. ‘Hmmm’ the man thought. ‘Maybe I’ll give them a try.’

He tore a plastic bag off the dispenser and loaded it with six ears of corn. Three for a dollar he thought, better get six. As far as the squash he loaded up the bag with what he guessed was two pounds of golden goodness. Curiously as he turned to the scale he noticed a man dressed in camouflage was eyeing him from behind the green beans. ‘That’s strange,’ he thought, ‘what’s he looking at me for?’ He turned and walked up to the next aisle which was filled with condiments including vinegar and salad dressing.

Reaching down to grab a jar of his favorite mayonnaise he felt a strange sensation tearing through his left quadricep. He stumbled back and slammed into the shelf behind him. Several jars of mustard fell on his head and shoulders. He looked up to see the man in camouflage standing over him with a glock pistol. It was aimed squarely at his forehead. “What did I do?” he managed to spit out despite the pain. “Why you were going to buy those genetically engineered vegetables you stupid son of a bitch”, growled the vigilante. “I am going to kill you quick, they would’ve killed you slow!”

‘Great,’ he thought to himself, ‘I am going to be killed by a frikking gun happy lunatic over a dosing of roundup.’ ‘Talk about a genetically modified vegetable, who modified this lunatic’s brain?’ Crack, crack the pistol exhorted. Soon his brains and blood were slowly leaking into the spilled mustard. Mixing into a bizarre dressing on the grocery store floor. “Clean up in aisle five!” the gun happy man proclaimed. “Call the police!” screamed an elderly man.

Five minutes later the police arrived. After the shell shock across the country there were five cruisers pulled up to the front of the store in three minutes flat. Seven policemen surrounded the glock wielding murderer demanding he drop his weapon immediately. Curiously the man complied and gently lowered his shiny pistol to the floor. An officer approached him and began to recite his Miranda rights. When he was finished the trembling man let himself be handcuffed and was led away without a struggle.

“Why did you do it?” the sergeant said as he carefully put the man in the back of the patrol car? “We are all going to die anyway, don’t you see?,” the murderer whispered, “It doesn’t matter anyway, I was just helping him out. If my bullet hadn’t got him he would’ve gotten cancer from those vegetables. We are all being lied to every day. Lies, lies and more lies. Don’t you see it? Nobody gives a damn anymore!” The sergeant closed the car door when the man had finished. ‘How many more of these Goddamn lunatics have guns?’ the sergeant thought to himself.

“I’m not upset that you lied to me, I’m upset that from now on, I can’t believe you” — Friedrich Nietzsche

Get off the cell phone and drive! — Jake Shween

Crashing Heaven’s Gate

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Rabbi Moshe Rabinowitz looked over the sea of heads and sighed. “Oy vey,” he thought to himself, “another hard days night at heaven’s gate.” Looking up he saw a large overweight man still holding the chicken sandwich that he had apparently choked to death on. “Name?” said the Rabbi. “Samuel,” said the bald fat man. “Oh here you are,” replied Moshe as he looked through a tome of considerable size. “So tell me what happened?” Bald fat Samuel seemed offended. “Where is Saint Peter?” he demanded. Moshe rolled his eyes and thought to himself another meshugana schlepp. Moshe sighed. “Peter hasn’t worked here since the eighties. He was a union employee and was fired when Reagan deregulated everything.” Samuel looked confused. He took another bite of his chicken sandwich and started choking again. Moshe suddenly knew what happened. “Oh I’m sorry, you’ve choked to death on your sandwich I see. A Chick Fil A sandwich no less. Okay right this way please.” Moshe pointed to a queue of people that led around a white pillar. Samuel begrudgingly went where he was told.

“Next” cried Moshe. An elderly man with a stately air walked slowly towards the podium. Moshe recognized him right away. “Why you’re that shmuck Gore Vidal,” Moshe cried. “Indeed I am,” said Mr. Vidal. “I have no idea what I am doing here, I thought I was going to be on Real Time with Bill Maher but I started coughing and ended up here.” Moshe stroked his beard. “I am sorry Mr. Vidal but this is the end of this act for you. If you please step straight ahead.” Moshe pointed behind him to a path by a stream that seemed to disappear into a cloud. “Where the hell does that go?” demanded Gore Vidal. “Why it’s heaven the land of peace and quiet!” exclaimed the Rabbi. “Horseshit,” repiled Gore. “Peace and quiet is not my style. Where is that bastard Buckley?” Moshe turned a bit pale. “Not here he didn’t quite make the cut. But since he was Catholic we were able to arrange a vacation in Purgatory for him for an indefinite amount of time.” “Well don’t waste my time send me there I am not done with that pusillanimous bastard yet!” growled Gore Vidal. Now Moshe was quite good at arranging things. He pointed to the left where an escalator was going down, down, down. “I’m on my way, thank you Rabbi.” Mr. Vidal embarked downward.

Now Samuel had waited quite some time and as he got closer he could see clearly why there was such a delay. It seemed at the end of the line, the entrance-way as it was, was a single white door and when it opened would admit only one person at a time. Finally it was Samuel’s turn to enter. The door opened wide and he walked into a white room. The door closed behind him. When the door had closed it disappeared. The room was seamless and starkly featureless. He was now in a bland white room forever. No colors, no sounds, no wind. Just whiteness which he seemed to fade into. An eternal prison of nothing.

The escalator went on and on. Pretty soon Gore could smell bus exhaust. Through the clouds the tops of buildings began to appear. The next thing you know there he was on Fifth Avenue in midtown looking at the Museum of Modern Art. Fancy this he thought to himself as he began to walk about headed towards Broadway. The city seemed its normal self with horns beeping and people bustling. He got to Broadway and rubbed his eyes. The marquis above the theater read: Tonight and Forever: Buckley Debates Vidal. Can you believe it he thought. The bastard has been waiting for me!

The writer would like to express his sincere condolences to the family of Gore Vidal. The world has lost a great literary lion whom can never be replaced. His writings and wisdom will live on as a testimony to his sharp wit and his keen sense of humanity. — Jake Shween

Get off the cell phone and drive! — Jake Shween

Listen to Lies and Watch Ice Melt

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Here we are with another week of lies and misquotes from the giant grinding Military Industrial Complex. Rape the earth and create jobs! Make more guns they don’t kill people! There is no such thing as climate change! If you have succeeded in life you did it all by yourself and no one need ever have helped you! How long will these blatant lies be tolerated and shoved down the throat of the human race by institutions such as Fox News? Do these people have absolutely no sense of the truth whatsoever?

Look at the latest reports of the ice melt on Greenland. In a matter of days the temperatures have seen an unheard of rise. Let’s see the fossil fuel burning oligarchy lie its way out of this one. Can’t wait to see what kind of incompetent fools Fox News assembles to explain this one away. Let’s just ignore the facts and proceed to strip mine Canada for dirty shale oil. Then not only will we have destroyed some of the last pristine arboreal forest on the planet we will have availed ourselves of more of that fossil fuel we crave. When it burns it will further corrupt the atmosphere and further aggravate climate change.

Images released Tuesday show the extent of surface melt on Greenland's ice sheet on July 8 (left) and July 12 (right). Measurements from three satellites showed that on July 8, about 40 percent of the ice sheet had undergone thawing at or near the surface. By July 12, 97 percent of the ice sheet surface had thawed.

Images released Tuesday show the extent of surface melt on Greenland’s ice sheet on July 8 (left) and July 12 (right). Measurements from three satellites showed that on July 8, about 40 percent of the ice sheet had undergone thawing at or near the surface. By July 12, 97 percent of the ice sheet surface had thawed.

At what point does humanity realize it does not own the earth? If this fact is not realized soon the Earth will be happy to prove it to us. Massive climate change and extinction has happened before. The Earth owns us.

“We choose the right to be who we are. We know the difference between the reality of freedom and the illusion of freedom. There is a way to live with the earth and a way not to live with the earth. We choose the way of earth. It’s about power, Ray.” — Jimmy Looks Twice from the movie Thunderheart

“I don’t have to have faith, I have experience.” — Joseph Campbell, The Power of Myth

Get off the cell phone and Drive! — Jake Shween

Livid Over LIBOR and Other Monopoly Game Trivia

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The banks are holding the people ransom for the value of their money. Just think if there weren’t any people all the money would be worthless. The latest scandal involves a collusion between banks setting the interest rates they would charge to lend money to each other. There is something seriously wrong with a system that can so arbitrarily decide the fates of millions of people with just an email asking a banker to fix an interest rate. This has turned into a perverse game corrupted by greed. No longer do these institutions serve any venerable purpose, instead it is now their province to find new and better ways to take our money. None of these money managers create wealth, but they sure know how to steal it.

Without new and firm regulation and resolution this idiocy is bound to continue. The difficulty is to find the few and the rare individuals who hold moral principles higher than their want of power or money. Perhaps this could be a new council instituted by the United Nations. Some sort of panel independent of the International Monetary Fund which has fallen prey to rampant corruption just like governments the world over. Independent of the Multinational Corporations which will, if left unrestrained with the same rights they have in the United States as citizens, eventually control the entire world. The time for change is now.

As mentioned before in this column, the simplest way to explain what has happened is just like in the game Monopoly. Sooner or later certain players own the most valuable resources and real estate and every one else pays. There is no built in system of sharing. The problem with a religious solution is that there are too many different systems of beliefs. It is time for people to forgo their ancient belief structures and venture some new tenets and mores which hold up but one prophet. Namely: The Common Good. A new version of an old idea. Something not based on an old religion of hunter gatherers who where at war with land owners and grain growers. Perhaps we could base it on common sense and preservation of humanity.

“Mother’s in the kitchen picking bones for breakfast
Boiling them down by the bushel and the score
Pull out your thumb and count what’s left of your fist
There’s a wolf at the window with ravening maw.”                                                          — Elvis Costello’s: National Ransom

Get off the cell phone and Drive! — Jake Shween

A Warm Dick, A Cold Bush and Romney’s Secret Heart

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Never seem to run out of material on the GOP hot dog Sir Romney of Mitt. Apparently he has a secret heart which he wishes to share with the NAACP. It was so delightful to see him actually spill out his plan to save African Americans from their plight. What a genuine and sincere man. Why I bet he’s even going to reveal his secret holdings in Bermuda to prove his sincerity. After all wasn’t he very swift in admitting that his health care plan he instituted when he was Governor of Massachusetts is the EXACT same plan that Barrack Obama put into place? We should never doubt the secret heart of this paladin, this superb example of pulchritude and luminosity.

Gosh how carefully and cleverly he has distanced himself from ex-President George W. Bush! What a clever manoeuvre to stay far away from the former GOP President who was losing jobs at the rate of 750,000 per month when he left office! Oh My! The very man who brought us into two wars, gave the rich huge tax cuts and fled during a banking crisis leaving the entire mess for the next guy to clean up! But wait he did actually endorse Sir Romney of Mitt! George said: “I’m for Mitt Romney”, as the elevator doors were closing on him. How symbolic and strangely appropriate. Sounds like a cold Bush!

Now Dick Cheney is opening his doors to Sir Romney of Mitt. Dick is warming up and hosting a reception at the Teton Pines country club in Wyoming. Big GOP rainmakers are sure to be in attendance. Later they will attend a dinner in Dick’s home in Wilson Wyoming. Maybe Dick can school him on how to be less charming and more of a Dick! This might help when the U.S. is negotiating on sensitive issues with foreign dignitaries and Sir Romney of Mitt is wielding the scepter. Maybe this is the obvious solution. Romney has a secret heart which calls for more Dick and less Bush. The bumper sticker would be awesome!

“Politics is the entertainment branch of Industry.” — Frank Zappa

“PETA is not happy that my dog likes Fresh Air.” — Willard Mitt Romney

Get off the cell phone and Drive! — Jake Shween